As Scene on TV
The reality TV president’s “Hunt the Immigrants” episode has already started shooting. It’s not scheduled to shoot until tomorrow but the production team is ahead of schedule. Trump’s ICE raids that were timed to launch his 2020 campaign are already good for ratings! Dads working in the fields and moms cleaning houses are being targeted by Trump’s Xeno Squad. Everybody is talking about ME. ME. ME!!!!
White people who swear they aren’t racist are wondering who is going to take care of their kids and mow their lawns. “What about the cost of my strawberry?”
To bomb or not to bomb — that was the question. Trump decided not to bomb Iran because it wouldn’t be good for ratings. Trump did warn Iran that they were lucky our drone was unmanned, though. DRONES ARE SUPPOSED TO BE UNMANNED YOU STUPID, STUPID IDIOT.
Trump doesn’t know what a fucking drone is.
Trump actually said, “There was no man in it…I have a feeling that it was a mistake made by somebody who shouldn’t have been doing what they were doing…it could have been somebody loose and stupid that did it.”
When asked what he was going do about Iran Trump said, “You’ll find out.” That’s Trump speak for I have no idea now somebody bring me a Diet Coke and the remote.
Trump ended up not bombing Iran like John Bolton and Mike Pompeo wanted him to. When Trump found out that they’d end up killing 150 Iranians he decided to pull back. Is 150 not enough or too many? What would be better for ratings?
It’s diplomatic malpractice to be dicking around with Iran on Twitter after pulling us out of the Iran deal. The guy needs to go. He’s a threat to the entire world. Nancy! Hello? Turn on the TV!
Shitty Republican congressman Kevin McCarthy wants Democratic congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio Cortez to apologize for calling Trump’s summer camps for brown kids “concentration camps.” Alexandria Ocasio Cortez wants Kevin McCarthy to apologize for the concentration camps.
The Alabama governor signed a law that allows churches to have their own police force because Jesus needs a gun at church in Alabama.
A judge unsealed some of Paul Manafort’s documents yesterday. There were hundreds of texts between him and Sean Hannity between 2017 and 2018. They texted each other like high school girls, discussing Hannity’s coverage of his case and Hannity’s strategy to attack the Mueller investigation on his show.
After he was raided by the FBI, Trump’s campaign manager was in regular communication with a TV host about spinning his case, the deep state, and Hillary Clinton. Hannity even texted Manafort while doing his show. Paul texted back, “I love you.”
Sean Hannity wrote, “Please know you are in my prayers.” Manafort replied, “Thank you. I need them. I feel so violated.”
As a big proponent of the deep state, every night Sean Hannity would accuse law enforcement of being part of a conspiracy involving Trump and now he is in the center of a conspiracy involving Trump.
Fox watches the Hen House. Story at 5!
Some of the people at Fox are pissed off about this. This kind of publicity makes Fox look like they aren’t a legitimate news organization.
Next week, the reality TV president’s episode will be about the fake news’ persecution of Saint Hannity.
And……scene.
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