Bad Mortals, Bad Ideas

Spike Dolomite
4 min readMar 21, 2018

The illegitimate president, Donald J. Trump, was selected by and marketed to the American people by a defense contractor, in a foreign country.

The board of directors of Cambridge Analytica gave their CEO, Alexander Nix, the boot because he was filmed under cover talking about his company filming under cover.

44 Republicans hired Cambridge Analytica to win their elections. That could be why they’re all so quiet.

Some of Cambridge Analytica’s clients are the NRA, the North Carolina Republican Party,brain surgeon turned Trump rival turned head of HUD, Ben Carson, junior senator from Arkansas, Tom Cotton, and Fox News personality, war lover and Trump’s possible pick for his next National Security Adviser, John Bolton. He paid Cambridge Analytica $1,152,299 from 2014 -2016 for “research” and “survey research.” And then there’s Ted Cruz. He paid them $5.8 million to help him win. Ted Cruz……..yuck. He’s one bad hombre.

The Mercer’s super PACs, “Keep the Promise I” and “Make America Number I,” paid Mercer’s company, Cambridge Analytica, $1,476,484 from 2015 through 2016 to get Ted Cruz elected. Kellyanne Conway was the leader of the PAC before she went to work for the Trump campaign.

Trump’s national security advisers explicitly told him not to call Putin to congratulate him on winning the election. They even put 4 x 6 cards in front of him that read, DO NOT CONGRATULATE PUTIN and he did it anyway. The Kremlin told the American media but Trump is pissed. He wants to know who leaked it from within the White House. WHO DID IT?!!!! WHO DID IT?!!!!

He told the press he did it, sitting next to a Saudi crown prince in the Oval Office, more than once. The prince was there to talk to Trump about money. Trump wants him to “invest” in the United States.

Republican hypocrite fun fact: Senator Marco Rubio is mad that someone leaked that the president congratulated Putin, too. “If you don’t like the guy, quit your job.”

“An American president does not lead the Free World by congratulating dictators on winning sham elections. And by doing so with Vladimir Putin, President Trump insulted every Russian citizen who was denied the right to vote in a free and fair election” — Senator John McCain

Kentucky Republican candidate for Secretary of State, Carl Nett, is under FBI investigation for threatening to shoot his opponent because he was proud of his F rating by the NRA. Will Trump attack the FBI for attacking Carl Nett on Twitter? He’s got all day.

White Supremacist, Arthur Jones, a Holocaust denier and Nazi lover, won the Republican primary in the Illinois Third Congressional District. He ran unopposed.

John Dean said that Trump is Nixon on steroids and stilts. John Dean was Nixon’s White House Counsel. He went to jail for his role in Watergate.

Billy Graham’s daughter said we deserve to be hit with a nuclear strike or torn in two by an earthquake. She and her family and the rest of the evangelical wing nuts have been warning us about the end of the world for 2,000 years.

A woman was killed by a driverless car in Arizona because driverless cars ARE A BAD IDEA.

A guy named Steve Hemmert lives a mile away from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School. He just got rid of his AR-15s because his thinking has changed. Collecting AR-15s is a bad idea. He hopes owning AR-15s goes the way of wearing fur.

Trump went to New Hampshire, “a drug invested den,” and made a speech in which he said that we should kill people who sell opioids. Death penalty for the drug dealers! Not for the pharmaceutical companies, pharmacies or doctors…….not those guys, they’re legitimate businessmen. No, let’s kill the guy who gets opioids from the pharmaceutical companies, pharmacies and doctors who then turns around and sells them on the street for a profit. He’s not a businessman. KILL HIM!

Austin was terrorized by a a twenty something white male bomber for 3 weeks. 6 bombs, 2 deaths, 4 injured. Trump didn’t say anything until the bomber was killed this morning. He tweeted that he was glad the bomber was DEAD! He didn’t call him a terrorist though. Twenty something, home grown, white males are not terrorists. They’re golden boys gone wrong. Failed by a male hating society.

Trump is in a PR war while the country is under attack by a foreign hostile enemy.

Bad mortals. Bad ideas.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.