Bellwether Friends
Trump called Republicans and told them not to sign on to any deal on the border because he doesn’t want Biden to get a win before election day. Mitt Romney is furious. He told the press, “The fact that he would communicate to Republican senators and congresspeople that he doesn’t want us to solve the border problem because he wants to blame Biden for it is really appalling.”
Right after the Supreme Court granted the Biden administration’s request to remove the deadly razor wires set up by Greg Abbott along the southern border (Justices Thomas, Alito, Gorsuch, and Kavanaugh dissented, of course) so that desperate people don’t slice themselves up trying to climb to safety, the Texas National Guard blew the court off and kept installing the wire, vowing to “hold the line” and “protect the sovereignty of our State.” Now they are in an actual standoff with Federal Border Patrol Troops. The bell tower doesn’t ring for the poor asylum seekers. It rings for the racist sadists.
Trump’s former White House trade advisor, Peter Navarro, was just sentenced to 4 months in jail for blowing off a congressional subpoena from the Select Committee that was charged with investigating January 6. They referred him to the DOJ for contempt of Congress. He tried to spin that he was some sort of victim outside of the courthouse today but you couldn’t hear him because there was a guy blowing a whistle and banging a cowbell to drown him out. America needs more cowbell.
Legislators in Florida are trying to pass a bell that would give Trump $5 million of taxpayer money to pay his bells.
Who said, “I follow my instincts, and I am never wrong”? a) Putin, b) Alexander the Great, c) Alexander Graham Bell, d) Mussolini, e) Trump. Answer: Mussolini
Republican Kentucky legislator and winner of the reality TV show, Survivor, Nick Wilson put forth a bill making it legal for first cousins to have sex. He doesn’t think that kissing, fornicating cousins should be classified as unlawful incest.
Evangelicals say Trump is the family values candidate. They are correct. He is the evangelical family values candidate where anything goes. Sex with first cousins, children, other people’s spouses (separately or all together), hookers, whatever rings your bell.
Sedition Hunters, the online sleuths who help law enforcement catch insurrectionists, caught Edward Richmond and now he’s going to jail for 3 years. He was picked up on camera at the Capitol wearing a black helmet, shoulder pads, goggles, and gloves, with an outward facing Louisiana state flag patch, holding a bright orange radio. Sedition Hunters dubbed him Buff Light Year. He’s a vet who was convicted of voluntary manslaughter and received a dishonorable discharge after he shot and killed a cow herder in Iraq. He was #182 on the FBI’s Most Wanted List for beating officers with a baton on January 6.
Over 60,000 women and girls have gotten pregnant after being raped in 14 states where abortion is illegal since the overturning of Roe v Wade. Republicans call the bell jar a blessing from God.
MAGAs really believe that the freedom bell belongs to them. They can’t get over how great their reflections look whenever they look at that bell. They look so good they want to ring themselves.
Hugh Hefner did for women what Trump did for mediocre white men, Fox News viewers and rednecks. Hugh talked women into taking their clothes off to get their pictures taken so men could tinker their bells while their wives were at church. He convinced women that that they were taking charge of their own bodies and destiny and that they were BEAUTIFUL! Getting naked was EMPOWERING! Trump told impotent white men and paranoid old people that they were better than everybody else. You’re SMART! You’re POWERFUL! You’re the real Americans!
The Republican voters are silver bells — old and white.
For whom the bell tolls — the MAGAs have already crossed the fascist bridge. Trump’s bellwether friends have been tricked into going to the dark side. Now blow it up so they get stuck there and can’t ever get back.
Republican parties at the state level are as much of a mess as the national GOP is. They are falling apart. People are being indicted, chairs are getting fired by memberships, groups and clubs are going broke, and there’s a ton of infighting between the MAGAs and the Never Trumpers. None of this is happening in state democratic parties. Democrats are no fools. They’d never jump off a bridge because a reality TV star told them to. They build bridges.
