Black Out

Spike Dolomite
4 min readOct 12, 2018


While the Florida panhandle was being scraped off of the map by a hurricane, Trump was preoccupied with exploiting a mentally ill famous black man in the Oval Office, surrounded by cameras, so black people will vote for Republicans in November. Because that’s all it takes to win the black vote — a guest appearance by a black man from one reality TV show to come on your reality TV show.

Kanye West said, “Liberals would try to control a black person through the concept of racism because we know we’re very proud emotional people. So when I said I like Trump to like someone as liberal, they’ll say, oh, but he’s racist. You think racism can control me? Oh, that don’t stop me.” Then he rambled on some more, talked about how wearing Trump’s red hat made him feel like Superman, that he had been diagnosed with bipolar disorder but that he’s really only sleep deprived, and then he cussed and got up and hugged Trump and said, “I love you!”

If Kanye West really had people around him who cared about him they would get him help and save him from himself by keeping him away from people like Trump and all of those cameras.

The secretary of state in Georgia, Brian Kemp, is holding back 53,000 voter registration applications, most of which are black citizens. Brian Kemp is running against Stacey Abrams for governor. Stacey Abrams is black.

A black woman who didn’t realize she was ineligible to vote thanks to Texas’ Jim Crow-era felony disenfranchisement law had to go back to jail for voting. A white GOP official in the same county committed actual fraud to get on the ballot and all she got was probation. In Iowa, a white woman voted twice for Trump and got 2 years probation and a $750 fine.

The Union County sheriff in Arkansas has been making black people who get arrested wear Nike shirts for their mugshots to humiliate them and mock Nike and Colin Kaepernick.

The Washington Supreme Court just struck down the death penalty, citing racial bias. More black and brown people are incarcerated and killed by the state than white people. This makes the 20th state to abolish the death penalty.

A white woman called the cops on a 9 year old black boy because she said that he sexually assaulted her when he accidentally brushed up against her in a crowded grocery store.

Black teens get shot. Rich white ones get on the Supreme Court. Black kids get tried as adults and white adults get treated like innocent children.

1 in 5 MAGAs don’t support the Emancipation Proclamation. They believe that freeing slaves was a bad idea.

Republican hypocrite fun fact: Jeff Flake did another TV interview and said he thought that the actions of Trump’s supporters at his rallies were disturbing. He said, “I do hope that somebody does run in the primary against the president.” There you go. Jeff Flake is running for president and he has maximized his last bit of time he has in the Senate to get a lot of publicity from making speeches, writing a book, calling for a last minute bogus investigation at the midnight hour, and doing a lot of TV interviews. He has created an image for himself that he is critical of Trump when he’s not. He votes with that shithead every time. Jeff Flake is a shit with great hair.

Trump said the reason why he went ahead and did his MAGA rally in Pennsylvania instead of staying in Washington to monitor Hurricane Michael was because thousands of people had lined up for a day and a half to see him and he just couldn’t let all of those white people down.

Republicans are freaking out, saying that Eric Holder (the former Attorney General who happens to be black) actually wants Democrats to get out there and kick conservatives. The Republican National Committee released a press release that read that the Democrats were chanting “fight” at a political rally and that Eric Holder said, “When they go low, we kick ‘em.” The liberals are calling for violence! Holder’s response? “OK, stop the fake outrage. I’m obviously not advocating violence. (In fact, when I was AG violent crime in the US was historically low.) I’m saying Republicans are undermining our democracy and Democrats need to be tough, proud and stand up for the values we believe in — the end.”

This is not the end.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.