Boasts, Threats, and a Hunk of Something Gross
Trump gave his first state of the union address last night and broke another record. It was the longest speech ever. He loves the sound of his own voice. Most people want to jump off a cliff when they hear it but not Trump. He gets so excited when he hears himself talk his thumb goes up.
Trump hacked up a piece of his tonsil that landed on his sleeve during his speech, on camera. It was gross, just like him.
Trump lied the whole time, as expected. He offered nothing new and gave no solutions, just the usual grievances, boasts and threats. He blamed everything on Biden and the Democrats. Nothing new there.
He called for the death penalty for cop killers. Is that for liberals who kill cops or everybody? Because his militia killed cops and Trump pardoned them.
Republicans have their panties in a bunch this morning over Democrat Al Green causing a scene last night. He didn’t behave. He got himself kicked out for standing and shouting at Trump that he didn’t have the mandate to kill Medicaid.
Speaking of panties, the Democrats brought their pink panties to a gun fight last night in a show of polite opposition. America is about to no longer exist and they’re still following the rules when Trump and the Republicans don’t follow any. Democrats need to start playing dirty or they won’t get to play at all for very much longer.
More Al Green, less Chuck Schumer.
The stock market tanked after Trump knocked Zelensky out in the Oval Office and the tariffs on Canada and Mexico were implemented. Justin Trudeau called Trump out in a press event and said that Canadians will fight back. They are a polite people but they’re not going to take this. He warned Americans, too. He said, in a polite way, that Trump is fucking us over.
After the Canadian press event, Trump tweeted at Justin Trudeau that if he increased their tariffs again that he’d go even higher. This is war.
Thanks to Biden, we had record highs in the economy and the stock market. Trump killed it in 30 days.
Social Security will soon collapse. Musk calls Social Security the greatest Ponzi scheme of all time. One in four Americans depends on it and their checks could stop coming within 90 days. Adult children better get that spare bedrooms ready because Grandma and Grandpa could be moving in.
Republicans want to cut $880 billion from Medicaid over the next decade. The program covers 1 in 5 people, including 1 in 3 with disabilities. What will they do without Medicaid? Suffer and die.
The GDP is falling.
Trump says he will prosecute all college protesters and put them in jail, get them kicked out of school or deport them if they weren’t born here.
Trump is calling all of the angry people showing up at town halls “paid agitators.” People are furious. They hate Elon Musk and they want Trump impeached. Mike Johnson told members not to hold town halls at all.
The Black Lives Matter street mural near the White House is getting painted over.
Fox News has a solution for the egg problem (Trump said he’d bring egg prices down on day one and they cost as much as $20 now). Fox’s solution? Get a chicken for every back yard like a chicken for every pot. Remember when they said the answer to the Affordable Care Act was bartering — trade a chicken for a check up.
J.D. Vance took his family to Vermont to ski but had to turn around because protesters ruined their vacation.
Trump has cut off all intelligence sharing with Ukraine. No more military assistance either. The U.S. is abandoning Ukraine on the battlefield.
People in Nebraska are crying the blues that the state is headed for bankruptcy. Nebraska has 93 counties. All but two voted for Trump.
MAGAs are getting what they deserve, and they’re feeling it and regretting it, only they’re taking the rest of us with them.
