Bullshit

Spike Dolomite
4 min readJun 29, 2021

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Toyota thinks that funding 37 seditionist candidates who voted to overturn the election won’t bite them in the ass because their plants are all located in deep red, anti-union states — Alabama, Indiana, Kentucky, Mississippi, and Texas where they get massive tax breaks but Republicans don’t buy Prius. Go to any protest or demonstration and you’ll see Priuses parked everywhere with bumper stickers that read COEXIST, Be Kind to Your Mother, There is No Planet B, Republicans Suck, Good Guys with Guns is Bullshit, and Boycott Toyota.

Mitt Romney may not be going along with the rest of his party who are trying to erase Trump trying to overthrow the government, but he is minimizing it by comparing the Big Lie to the world of professional wrestling — it’s all just for show. Bullshit Mitt, and you know it.

Bill Barr is trying to rehabilitate his reputation by calling Trump’s claims of Biden stealing the election “bullshit.”

“Don’t buy Barr’s book. He already gave his lies away for free when he was in government.” — Walter Shaub

Jared and Ivanka are hanging really low because they know they’re not welcome anywhere and they know their days are numbered and that Trump will throw them both under the bus. Their taxpayer funded secret service detail runs out next month. Prosecutors are putting the squeeze on the CFO of the Trump Organization, Allen Weisselberg, who knows everything, including what role Ivanka has played in the Trump Family crimes. Back in December, Ivanka said she barely knows Allen Wiesselberg who has been part of the family business since before she was born. She’s known him her whole life. Bullshit, Ivanka.

It’s every Trump for himself now. Eric and his wife, what’s her face, are hanging low and Junior is staying wasted all the time. All of their enablers have left them to spin their own bullshit.

It was 115 degrees in Portland, Oregon yesterday. It should only be in the mid 70s. The northwest is having extreme weather due to climate change. This is the beginning of a permanent emergency. People don’t have air conditioning and are getting over heated, grocery stores have had to cover refrigerated sections with plastic to keep the temperature down on perishable foods, roads are buckling and cracking, street car cables are melting and the metal in bridges is expanding. This is bullshit. Preventable fossil fuels bullshit.

It’s been 6 days since the condo in South Florida fell to the ground in the middle of the night. 11 have been found dead and 150 are still unaccounted for.

Profit before people is BULLSHIT.

Republicans don’t consider climate change an infrastructure issue even though roads are twisting and busting open, already fragile bridges are expanding and contracting when they shouldn’t be, public transportation has to shut down because the wiring that runs them becomes inoperable when cables melt, food goes bad, and people die in areas not equipped to handle extreme temperatures. Republicans think all of the cries about climate change are bullshit. Pass the oil!

Republicans want to minimize or have us forget what the last year was like. Millions were unemployed. There were long lines at food pantries with many first timers. Everything closed down and people were isolated in their homes. Thousands died of covid every day. Protesters and militarized police were in the streets. A mad man lied about the pandemic and knowingly let people die then told his attorney general and generals to shoot and jail his enemies and protesters. Republicans dismissing or lying about this is total bullshit.

One good thing happened last year. The earth came back to life for awhile.

The bullshit right wing wacko Daily Caller tweeted: Tucker Carlson says a whistleblower told him that he is being spied on by the NSA and that he filed a FOIA request for information: “The Biden administration is spying on us. We have confirmed that.”

Tucker is running with that, of course. He’s claiming that the government is spying on him. If Fox is going to keep getting away with lying to their viewers, pushing conspiracy theories and propaganda, and inciting violence by hiding behind the first amendment and claiming that they’re just an entertainment network and not an actual news network every time they get in legal trouble, why not force them to post bullshit disclaimers at the top of every hour that watching this show could be dangerous to your mental health like cigarette companies had to do on every pack of cigarettes?

While all of this is going on (re-writing history in real time, the Trumps facing consequences for their bullshit con, the planet burning up and infrastructure falling apart, the rich gobbling up all the wealth while people live in the streets, and Republicans refusing to not only own the truth about our racist past and present but are exploiting it to further divide people) people are spinning their wheels, desperately trying to hold on and keep their balance, wondering where America the great went, hating each other, but believing this is only temporary, because America is the greatest country in the world, right? Right?

“America is better than this” is bullshit. This is who we are.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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