Call ’Em Out

Spike Dolomite
4 min readMar 2, 2023

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Jim Jordan, Lauren Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and other MAGA Republicans sent a stupid letter to Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg attacking him for his poor response to the train derailment in Ohio without knowing that the National Transportation Safety Board has nothing to do with his department. It’s an independent agency. Pete set them straight.

Matt Gaetz cited and entered into the record an article from the Global Times, a pro-China publication in a House Armed Services Committee meeting. Trump’s administration had labeled it propaganda in 2020. He got called out on it. A member of the sedition caucus of Congress read Chinese propaganda on the House floor.

Matt Gaetz invited an accused murderer into Congress to lead the members in the pledge of allegiance before a meeting. Gaetz first thought he’d own the libs by suggesting that members of Congress invite upstanding American patriots to come in and lead them in the pledge of allegiance before meetings, thinking the Dems wouldn’t go for it and he could make a huge deal out of it on Fox. They surprised him by voting yes. His guest, Corey Beekman, was charged with murder in Michigan and a few other felonies three years ago. He shot 2 people with 2 kids in the house. He shot the mom but she lived. He shot a 32 year old man three times and he died. He got in a standoff with SWAT for an hour and a half and was caught alive but he hasn’t stood trial yet. Gaetz met him at a gun club. Eric Swalwell called him out publicly during the meeting.

Marjorie Taylor Greene is upset because somebody called her out by getting up in her face at a restaurant and telling her what a horrible person she was. Marjorie was offended. She said it used to be that people were civil to one another even though they had different views.

Ron DeSantis is banning the teaching of “inclusion” in Florida schools. All colleges and universities are forbidden to spend any money to fund pedagogy, programming, or activities that “espouse diversity, equity, and inclusion.” In other words, whites only. He gets called out on his demagoguery but he silences his critics. At a book signing he just did at a bookstore, MAGAs protested him outside. He sent store security out to tell them to leave because they were wearing Trump branded merchandise and holding Trump signs and flags. The security guard was a MAGA too but the governor told him to tell his critics to leave so he did it. The MAGAs called him out on it an accused him of acting like the left. Ron DeSantis has people thrown out all the time if he doesn’t approve of them.

Ron DeSantis called the Florida Democratic Party a dead, rotten carcass on the side of the road. He “wants to get rid of it.”

Special Counsel Jack Smith has subpoenaed Jared and Ivanka, Mike Pence, Mark Meadows, and a number of fake electors actors from Georgia, New Mexico, Nevada, Michigan, Arizona, Pennsylvania and Wisconsin. The head of the snake will be called out soon.

Trump the snake called Jack Smith a “Mad dog psycho.”

The Mormon church got busted for hiding $32 billion.

The Michigan GOP is bankrupt and can’t pay its staff. Everybody is working for free right now.

Former Secretary of State, Mike Pompeo, wrote a book. His PAC bought $42K worth of copies which was enough to get him on the NYT bestsellers list. He’s bragging about it even though he paid to play. How many books written by Republicans that make the NYT bestsellers list are actually read? Are they given away for free as booby prizes at Republicans events such as CPAC?

RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel, Senator Mitch McConnell, Speaker Kevin McCarthy, and Governor Glenn Younkin won’t be going to CPAC this year because Nazis took it over and they don’t want to get their pictures taken with Nazis. They won’t call Nazis out though. They can’t afford to lose any voters. Trump will be there. Attendants should be loaded down with books written by Republicans. Boobs.

A lawyer is arguing that the unborn child of a pregnant inmate in South Florida is unlawfully being held without being charged. Are they calling out the pro-birth Republicans in state government by giving a fetus rights or are they serious? Are they right to lifers who want to free the unborn?

Transgender minors in Mississippi can no longer receive gender-affirming care in the state after its Republican governor signed a bill that prohibits doctors from providing both hormone treatments and surgical procedures. Most people in Mississippi are kept in the dark by their elected officials so not many people will call them out.

Iowa Republicans introduced a bill to ban gay marriage and used God to do it. Calling all gay people in Iowa — your government is going to out you.

Republicans haven’t mentioned inflation or gas prices in a long time. They’re busy stirring up crap to get white supremacists and homophobes agitated so they won’t think for a minute that they’re being screwed by their elected representatives. Republicans are afraid of being called out by people who vote for them.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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