CALM DOWN AND ENJOY THE RIDE
It’s the first day of the new year and Trump is tweeting like a he knows what 2019 has in store for him. He wished everybody a happy new year “…..even the haters and losers” and then told everybody to calm down and enjoy the ride, all in caps.
CALM THE FUCK DOWN!
Melania rang in the new year without her sugary daddy. She was at Mar-a-Lago all by herself, doing the catwalk and giving her trademark empty stare. Enjoy the ride Melania, but keep the number for Uber handy in your phone because you’re going to need a ride out of Washington on a moment’s notice. Calm down………you can take your monogrammed gold digger spoons with you when you go.
Here’s how Trump’s year went: He lost 65% of his cabinet members and executive staff, US stocks suffered their worst year since the financial crisis in 2008, he did 44 MAGA rallies and went golfing 67 times, he got a law passed to benefit the rich and stick it to the 99% and an angry alcoholic accused of sexual assault appointed to the Supreme Court, 6 people involved in his campaign were either indicted or pled guilty, and he’s under criminal investigations in Washington and New York.
Trump can’t calm down. That’s why he’s binge tweeting this morning all by himself in an empty White House.
“Reminder. He called a reporter pretending to be someone else to brag about his sexual prowess. He defrauded people of their life savings with a fake university. The President of the United States is a sick criminal. New Year’s resolution: Get him the fuck out of the White House.” — Rob Reiner
Trump claims that Obama has a 10 foot wall around his house. He doesn’t.
Obama has a wall. How come I don’t have a wall? GIVE ME MY WALL!!!!!
Jeez! Calm down, Humpty Trumpty! What’s your deal with the wall?
Trump’s got $5 billion lying around, right? He’s rich! Why doesn’t he just pay for the wall?
Lindsey Graham went on TV to talk about Trump’s wall for him. He acted really calm. He said, “I’m not asking Mexico to pay for it. I’m asking the American people to pay for it,” like he was talking directly to kidnappers who might be watching, expecting a ransom.
Republicans are already attacking Elizabeth Warren a day after she announced her run for the presidency. They’re saying she takes a specific medication for autism. Calm down, Republicans. Accusing Elizabeth Warren of having autism is so……….so……….what the hell?
Trump tweeted this too this morning: Heads of countries are calling wanting to know why Senator Schumer is not approving their otherwise approved Ambassadors!? Likewise in Government lawyers and others are being delayed at a record pace! 360 great and hardworking people are waiting for approval from…….
What the hell was he talking about? What the hell? Calm the fuck down you raving lunatic and put the phone down!
A 5 year old boy took a gun that he found in the back pocket of his mom’s car seat and shot himself in the face while they were in line at a Wendy’s drive through in North Carolina. Mom said she didn’t know that gun was there. Dad said he put it there and forgot about it. Do we feel sorry for the parents and encourage them to calm down because it was just a tragic accident? No. No we don’t. We start prosecuting parents who endanger their own children by leaving loaded guns within their reach.
NO WE WILL NOT CALM DOWN, YOU PARANOID, DELUSIONAL, POWERLESS, CARELESS GUN NUTS! We want gun legislation now! You guys are DANGEROUS!
Calm down and enjoy the ride, real America. Trump, the Republicans, the MAGAs, the gun nuts, and the Russians are going to get what’s coming to them in 2019. This is our year.
I’ve started compiling my Daily Crime Reports as “quarterly reports” for The Treason Chronicles. Get the first 2 reports today!
Treason Chronicles 1st Quarter 2017: Daily Crime Reports by Spike C. Dolomite ebook on Amazon for $3.99 April-June 2017
Treason Chronicles 2nd Quarter 2017: Daily Crime Reports by Spike C. Dolomite ebook on Amazon for $3.99 July-September 2017
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