Capitol Offense

There hasn’t been a federal briefing on what happened at the Capitol in 6 days. Journalists, congress members and law enforcement have been on their own to piece things together, using a lot of social media posts that MAGAs themselves stupidly made. Last night Democrats were finally briefed about just how much danger they were in, citing 3 different plots. One of them was MAGA Men circling the Capitol and assassinating Democrats on their way into the building.

“They’re talking about 4,000 armed ‘patriots’ to surround the Capitol and prevent any Democrat from going in. They have published rules of engagement, meaning when you shoot and when you don’t. This is an organized group that has a plan.” — Congressman Conor Lamb

2 Capitol Hill police officers have been suspended and more than a dozen are under investigation for their possible roles in aiding rioters.

Emily Rainey, a psychological operations officer in the US Army led 100 MAGAs to the Capitol and is now being investigated. She took a selfie of herself wearing a mask that said “I am wearing this against my will” while she was in the Capitol as well as a video of herself saying Antifa was inside.

The FBI has warned that armed protests are being planned at all 50 state capitols from January 16–20 and at the US Capitol from January 17–20. Some state offices for congress members will be targeted as well. Meanwhile, the Department of Homeland Security has no leader. Acting secretary Chad Wolf has resigned.

75 year old Democratic Congresswoman Bonnie Watson Coleman of New Jersey, who just finished treatment for breast cancer, has Covid as well as Democratic Congresswoman Pramila Jayapal from Washington. They both believe they became infected while sheltering in place inside the Capitol with Republicans who refused to wear masks. Congresswoman Lisa Blunt Rochester tried passing masks out but 6 Republicans who were all sitting together mocked or ignored her (among them were Steve Scalise and newly elected QAnon weirdo Marjorie Taylor Greene.) Republicans refused to comply with the simplest gesture of respect during a double life and death situation because they’re assholes who not only condone and incite violence but they commit it too. Deliberately refusing to protect others from a deadly virus is an act of violence and they should face charges.

More is coming out about newly elected Republican Lauren Boebert who was communicating with the rioters about the whereabouts of the Speaker via Twitter. She has been arrested 4 times over the past 10 years. One of the arrests was when she was wasted drunk at a music festival and tried to get away from the cops screaming that she had friends at Fox News and if they arrested her it would become national news. Another time she was arrested for harassing her neighbors with her pit bulls. She went to jail for a few hours for another arrest and then was endorsed by the guy who ran the jail 3 years later. She’s a QAnon weirdo and her husband is a perv (he got busted for exposing himself to a teenaged girl in a bowling alley.) She’s a gun nut. She owns a restaurant in Colorado called, “Shooters Grill” and makes her wait staff wear guns. Since she doesn’t believe in government she doesn’t believe in following health codes so naturally people have gotten sick from eating at her restaurant. Was she packing on 1776 (that’s what she and the rest of the Sedition Caucus called the storming of the Capitol) and if so, why didn’t she whip out her Glock to “protect herself?” If she wasn’t packing why isn’t she all over the TV making the case that if all members in Congress had been carrying a weapon they would have been able to kill everybody that wanted to kill them? She’s got 4 kids. One of them was born when she was still a kid and another was born in the front seat of her pick up truck. Republicans aren’t sending their best to Congress.

Jacob Chansley, AKA Jake Angeli, the guy from Arizona who was dressed like Braveheart with the fur, horns, bare chest and body paint is sitting in jail and he’s hungry. Is he on a hunger strike? No. His mom says he hasn’t eaten since Friday because they won’t feed him all organic food.

Trump hasn’t spoken to Mitch McConnell since December 15 when McConnell said Biden won. Trump finally met with Pence yesterday for the first time. Is Pence still loyal to Trump even though he tried to have him assassinated? We’ll find out today. If he doesn’t invoke the 25th, then he’s staying with his batterer, believing that Trump really loves him and promising that he won’t do anything to ever make Trump want to assassinate him ever again.

Nancy Pelosi went on record to say that many people have chosen their whiteness over democracy and that Trump should face prosecution.

Deutsche Bank and Signature Bank, the only 2 banks who have had anything to do with Trump and his family are ending their relationships with them. Deutsche says they will not conduct any future business with the Trump Organization and Signature Bank has closed his accounts. Getting cut off by his 2 banks is as bad as getting cut off by Twitter. He can’t survive without either.

Billionaire right wing mega donor Sheldon Adelson has died. One of the first Presidential Medal of Freedom awards that Trump gave was to his widow as a proper thank you gift for the millions she and her husband gave him to take over the world.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders and other Republicans have been obsessed with all of the followers that they’ve lost since the insurrection. Turns out it’s not because they’ve been rejected by their admirers, but because Twitter deleted over 70,000 QAnon accounts.

House Democrats have introduced one simple article of impeachment charging Trump with “incitement of insurrection” and they are ready to vote on it tomorrow without hearings if Pence decides to stand by his man.

8 more days until the guy who said, “Would you shut up, man?” shuts that man up.

Support the Daily Crime Report on Patreon!

For a copy of the Trump-Ukraine Impeachment Inquiry Report, click here.

For a copy of the Mueller Report, click here.

For a list of attorneys giving legal analysis about the imploding Trump presidency on Twitter, click here.

For the best journalists to follow on Twitter, click here.

For straight news, check out these reliable sources on Twitter.

The Daily Crime Reports are being published as “quarterly reports” (three month groups) as part of “The Treason Chronicles” on Amazon for Kindle. To purchase one or more quarters, click here.



Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.