Convicted Felon Out on Bail Running for President

Spike Dolomite
3 min readNov 4, 2024

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Kamala Harris surprised her team by announcing that they’d be making a quick stop in New York on Saturday night so she could do the surprise opening for Saturday Night Live. Trump got so jealous he posted that he hates SNL on Truth Social like he was in 7th grade.

50,000 people rallied in Puerto Rico to protest Trump. This was the second biggest rally this election season. The biggest rally was not Trump’s — it was Kamala’s, at the very site Trump called on his followers to attack the Capitol on January 6, 2021.

Trump ran the worst campaign in history and he’s going to lose. He knows it. His campaign knows it, but everybody else will believe it when they see it because they have PTSD so bad from the past 9 years by Trump they’re afraid to feel hopeful.

Women are turning out to vote at a higher rate than men all across the country. They’ve had it with Trump and white Republican men in general. Trump thinks he’s good for women. “I want to protect the women of our country … I’m gonna do it whether the women like it or not.”

Joe Biden said something about Trump being garbage and the media chewed on that for days instead of reporting on Trump’s mental state and the fact that he’s already tried to overthrow the government once and is a convicted felon. Trump’s team had him ride in a Trump branded garbage truck to capitalize on the Biden comment which backfired of course. It made him look gross and absurd. He thought he was as hot driving that garbage truck as he is taking care of women whether they like it or not.

Trump sued CBS News for $10 billion because he said they doctored the interview Harris did on 60 Minutes. He’s calling it election interference and accused CBS of tipping the scales to the Democratic Party. He did it to steal headlines but the media ignored him to cover Biden’s garbage comment.

Over 70 million have voted already. Election day is tomorrow. That’s about 20% of the total number of people who voted in the 2020 election.

Trump went to New Mexico to campaign but since he doesn’t pay his bills the city told him they wouldn’t assist him with a venue or police protection because he still owes them from the last time he was there so he got stuck having to campaign on the tarmac. He owes the city of Albuquerque $450,000.

9 million more Americans have received coverage through the Affordable Care Act under the Biden Administration. Open enrollment just started. Sign up at HealthCare.gov.

Trump simulated giving a blow job with a microphone at the podium at one of his latest MAGA rallies.

Florida, Nebraska, South Dakota and North Dakota all have marijuana on the ballot which is great for Democrats.

Trump called Liz Cheney a war hawk who deserved to be shot in the face by 9 guns. Now this presidential candidate is under investigation by the attorney general of Arizona to determine if that was an actual death threat. That made Trump mad so he challenged Liz Cheney to a fight.

Trump said that he should never have left the White House after his 2020 defeat and joked that reporters should get shot.

Trump is signaling to his most deranged cult followers that he wants them to commit violence in his name.

Ads are being run in law journals warning attorneys that representing Trump could cost them their good reputations and livelihood because they could very well lose their bar licenses if they associate themselves with Trump. He’s not worth it.

The Republican presidential nominee is set to be SENTENCED for 34 felonies in three weeks, on November 26. The Republican candidate is a convicted felon out on bail.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.

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