Game of Thrones

Spike Dolomite
4 min readJan 4, 2020

As Trump sat on his fat ass on his gawdy gilded country club throne in South Florida, he had a simple thought, “Hey, if I kill Soleimani that would beat killing Bin Laden and if I start a war Congress can’t remove me during war time. I’ll get to be king forever and never have to go to jail. Game on!”

Trump didn’t know who Soleimani was, or care, before he got the chance to kill him. Soleimani has been around for awhile. Obama didn’t take him out because Obama didn’t sit on a throne and he understood what would happen on a global scale if he did. Stirring up shit in the Middle East is not a game.

So why kill Soleimani right now, right after impeachment and before the Senate trial? Well, like a first grader, Trump was shown a power point with pictures explaining the attack on the US embassy in Baghdad. One of the slides had a list of responses that the US could take. One of them was taking out Soleimani. He picked that one without understanding the global consequences or having a follow up plan. He just did it, sitting safely on his throne before grabbing his putter and getting back to his game.

In normal times the president would go on national TV and somberly let the country know what happened, why it happened, and reassure everyone that it was necessary and that the government had everything under control. Not Trump. He bragged in a tweet, golfed, and then went to an evangelical rally in Miami and let weirdos lay their hands on him and pray. He made a MAGA speech, heavy on Christianity, and said he killed Soleimani to stop a war. Weirdos in MAGA hats talking in tongues with their hands up in the air and tears streaming down their faces cheered for their savior Trump and booed the reporters who were there covering the event.

He ordered a second air strike north of Baghdad which killed 6 people. He has yet to say why he did it. Probably to “stop a war.”

Secretary of State Mike Pompeo told Fox News that the Europeans hadn’t been as helpful as he hoped. The Brits, the French and the Germans don’t understand, “we saved lives in Europe as well.” They understand. They understand that being president is just a game to Trump and all of the world’s bad guys are playing him.

Trump has spent the last 3 years saying the US intelligence community is part of the deep state and that it can’t be trusted but this time we can believe them because he got to kill an Iranian bad guy. MAGAs and conservative media are accusing Democrats of siding with the enemy because they’re not falling for it. Not because Soleimani wasn’t a bad guy. He was. They recognize that this is just a game and question why now? His whereabouts have been known before. His murderous crimes have been out in the open for a long time.

The answer is simple. Trump did it for himself, because Trump does everything for himself.

He made this irrational, impulsive decision without the guidance of competent advisors. Consequences weren’t debated because Trump goes by his gut and is always right. Everything is a game to him and he’s always the winner.

He did it all with a State Department that is way under staffed and a Secretary of State who believes that they killed Soleimani for God and if we end up in WWIII it will all be OK. It’s right there in the Bible. He’ll be one of the chosen ones who gets lifted up by Jesus so he’s not worried. He’s played the game his whole life and according to the game’s rules, the winners are the believers in the reckoning of the Holy War.

We have no idea what’s coming next. All we have is Trump’s tweets.

Moscow Mitch would like everyone to just calm the fuck down about Iran and trust the Trump administration’s judgment.

We have a president and an administration that literally lies about everything……dozens of lies per day, and we’re being asked to believe them by the leader in the Senate who is also a known liar.

Republicans stood by him when he banned Muslims from entering the country. They stood by him when he kidnapped migrant children and put them in concentration camps. They didn’t say a word when he stepped over into to North Korea, an enemy communist country that we’re technically still at war with to shake a dictator’s hand, they haven’t done a damn thing about Trump being indebted to Russia and Putin telling him what to do. They didn’t make a peep when he alienated all of our allies. Now he’s about to start WWIII and they’ll let him because they’d rather just toss the game board across the room than give up their thrones.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.