How Do Democrats Debate MAGA Republicans?

Spike Dolomite
4 min readOct 17, 2022

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Debate season has begun. Midterms are 23 days away. People who don’t pay much attention to politics are just starting to tune in. The Black Trump, Herschel Walker, didn’t show up to the second debate yesterday. He just blew it off. Raphael Warnock answered questions on stage standing next to an empty podium. He was a no-show most likely because he bombed the first debate a few days ago. When Senator Warnock said he’d never pretended to be a police officer after Walker accused him of being Biden, Walker pulled out a fake badge to prove that he was, in fact, a police officer. The memes and jokes flooded social media. When asked whether he would support Medicaid expansion so the people of Georgia could get Obamacare, Walker said Americans should “get off the government health care and get on the health care Warnock’s got.” When asked if he would support capping insulin costs, he said people should just “eat right” instead. He said he would support Trump running for president again because he’s his friend. When the moderator point blank asked him about paying for an abortion he called his accuser (who he had another kid with) a liar even though she provided copies of the receipts.

“The craziest thing about Herschel Walker’s badge is I thought he was gonna pull out another kid.” — Adam Parkhomenko

After the news broke that Herschel Walker paid for an abortion, he attended a prayer luncheon and was given a hero’s welcome. Most of the voting “Christians” there were white. They surrounded him with prayer (prayer for the win, not his soul). Mitch McConnell has been coaching Walker. He doesn’t care that he’s a pro-lifer whose stump speech includes the importance of fathers even though he has paid for abortions, abandoned 4 women and children, and pulled a gun on one of them and threatened to kill her. He doesn’t care that he’s dumber than an empty bottle of bourbon. He doesn’t care that he lied about graduating from college at the top of his class or that he’s insane. All McConnell cares about is that seat. He doesn’t care what that costs Georgia, the country, or the Senate as an institution. The two men having nothing in common other than they’re both chronic liars. One lies so much he doesn’t even know when he’s lying. The other one is a professional liar with a demon’s heart.

Marcus Flowers debated Marjorie Taylor Greene yesterday and she made a fool of herself, as usual. Like Herschel Walker, she’s really too dumb to be in Congress and she wouldn’t be if she hadn’t run unopposed 2 years ago. She told Flowers, “The ‘Democrat’ party is the party of child abuse. It’s the party that represents grooming children and sexualizing children at school, teaching anti-white racism in the terms of CRT education and genitalia mutilation of kids that can’t even get a driver’s license, can’t get a tattoo and cannot vote.” What does a rational person say to that?

Ron Johnson said the FBI set him up during his senatorial debate last week. The audience laughed at him.

Kari Lake, the MAGA Republican candidate for governor of Arizona, refused to commit to accepting the results of the election if she loses. “I’m going to win the election, and I will accept that result,” she said. She has said she wants to secede from the United States, endorses ivermectin “It works, I’ve taken it. It’s a wonder drug. Anthony Fauci kept that from us.” and has called for Dr. Fauci to be arrested. After Mussolini #2, Giorgia Meloni, won the Italian election a couple of weeks ago she went on Tucker Carlson’s show and said “If you’re not being called” a “fascist” and a “racist” then “you’re probably not representing the people of your country.”

RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel wants to sue Google because she claims that their emails are going straight to spam.

MAGA Republicans keep saying that Democrats are making kitty litter available to school kids who identify as cats.

Trump and Kanye West went on an anti-Semite rant over the weekend. Trump says the Jews don’t appreciate him like they should after all he did for Israel. They love him so much over there that he could be prime minister. Jews here should love him as much as the evangelicals do. Kanye West, the other Black Trump and just as crazy, got kicked off of social media for all of his anti-Semitic rants so he’s going to buy Parler.

The Republican party is no more. Trump took it over. Republicans are running election denying MAGA halfwit fascists, racists, anti-Semites, homophobes, liars, and misogynists. The GOP’s only goal is to maintain power and uphold white supremacy. Debating them should be a no brainer because they’re so incompetent but unfortunately the people who vote for these dangerous, foolish, anti-American nuts have no brain.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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