Impeach the Son of a Bitch. TODAY.

Spike Dolomite
4 min readSep 20, 2019

The whistleblower said it was more than one incident that drove him or her to come forward. The intelligence community inspector general considered the complaint, a promise Trump made to a foreign power, to be so urgent that he informed Congress of the complaint’s existence personally rather than trusting intelligence leaders to do so.

The news of Trump bribing a foreign leader more than once is pointing more and more towards Ukraine. Trump withheld promised military aid from Ukraine to fight Russia unless they gave him dirt on his political rival, Joe Biden. Trump’s attorney, Rudy Giuliani, went to Ukraine to seal the deal. When CNN’s Chris Cuomo asked him if went to Ukraine for Trump, Rudy ranted for 30 long, sweaty, code red minutes and blurted out, “Of course I did!” He ordered the code red.

Trump released the extorted military aid to Ukraine yesterday and all of a sudden Moscow Mitch is willing to pass the bill that has been sitting on his desk for months to protect our elections.

Everybody is freaking out in the White House this morning. Trump doesn’t want anybody near him while he’s on the phone. He tweeted: The Radical Left Democrats and their Fake News Media partners, headed up again by Little Adam Schiff, and batting Zero for 21 against me, are at it again! They think I may have had a “dicey” conversation with a certain foreign leader based on a “highly partisan” whistleblowers statement. Strange that with so many other people hearing or knowing of the perfectly fine and respectful conversation, that they would not have also come forward. Do you know the reason why they did not? Because there was nothing said wrong, it was pitch perfect!

Trump is going after the whistleblower, with Bill Barr’s help. Bill Barr should have nothing to do with this. He’s the new Michael Cohen. Both the White House and the Department of Justice are involved in the cover up. Not a single Republican has stepped up to denounce this and call for impeachment. Why not? Because Trump has something on them too.

Trump is the first president to have a whistleblower complaint filed against him.

Trump is suing the Manhattan DA over his tax returns being subpoenaed. That wasn’t even the top news story of the day.

The inspector general for the intelligence community went before the House Intelligence Committee and was too scared to talk. Committee Chair Adam Schiff told the press afterwards, “We can’t get an answer because the DOJ & the DNI will not authorize the Inspector General to tell us. This shows someone is trying to manipulate the system to keep information about an urgent matter from the Congress.” This wasn’t the top story for long because it got bumped for live footage of Trump’s personal attorney confessing on TV.

Trump is screaming presidential harassment. He says he should not only not be indicted, but he should not be investigated either.

Trump asks, “…is anybody dumb enough to believe that I would say something inappropriate with a foreign leader while on such a potentially ‘heavily populated’ call …?” Too easy.

Republican hypocrite fun fact: The Democrats could use some help. Trump needs to be impeached right this minute but the Republicans aren’t saying a word. They’re hiding under their desks like America’s school children fearing getting shot.

There is a bit of good news to report. There is a global climate strike today and Colt won’t be making any more AR-15s for civilians.

Fox and Friends made fun of the students participating in the global climate strike and then went to a story on catastrophic rain and flooding in Texas.

Stephen Miller has a girlfriend. Ewwww. It gets ewwwwier. She is Mike Pence’s new press secretary. Her name is Katie Waldman and she took care of communications defending Trump’s family separations for the Department of Homeland Security. Ewwww.

Hitler had a girlfriend, too. Ew.

Trump accepted help from the Russians to win in 2016. He admitted to George Stephanopoulos, sitting at his desk in the oval office, on TV, that he would accept dirt on an opponent by a foreign government if it would help him win an election, and now he’s getting busted for extortion and bribing Ukraine to help him win in 2020.

Impeach the son of a bitch. TODAY. Whatever Trump has on the Republicans, they better suck it up and deal with it TODAY.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.