Impeachment Day #3

Spike Dolomite
4 min readNov 20, 2019
The Three Jugheads

On the 1,034th day of the Trump disaster presidency, the House Intelligence Committee conducted its third open impeachment inquiry hearing — 4 witnesses, 2 sessions, 12 hours. These witnesses were the first witnesses to testify who were on the 7/25 Ukraine drug deal phone call.

Republicans prepared for the hearing by not eating anything the day before so they wouldn’t have nervous explosive diarrhea sitting in their hot seats. Devin Nunes tried to reframe the day by saying that the Democrats were the ones who made the drug deal. He thought he could give them “drug deal” like the Democrats took “Obamacare.” Didn’t work. He just looked like a jughead.

Nunes bashed the media in his opening statement and throughout the day, calling reporters the “puppets of the Democratic party” and demanded to know the identity of the whistleblower.

The most compelling of all 4 witnesses was Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman. Born in the Soviet Union, his father emigrated to the United States when he was a toddler to escape the USSR and give his sons a shot at a good life. All of his sons have dedicated their lives to the US military. Lt. Col. Vindman appeared before Congress wearing his military uniform which is customary and also the law. He spoke about his family’s gratitude for America as refugees and their loyalty to their country. He has had no other career. He reminded everyone that he would be killed in the Soviet Union for doing what he’s doing, speaking truth to power, to the most powerful man in the world. He also took a moment to recognize the courage of his colleagues who are being attacked by Trump and the Republicans, “I want to say that the character attacks on these distinguished and honorable public servants are reprehensible.” He reassured his father that he would be OK for telling the truth, because this is America.

“Dad, my sitting here today, in the US Capitol talking to our elected officials is proof that you made the right decision forty years ago to leave the Soviet Union… Do not worry, I will be fine for telling the truth.”

When asked why he felt so confident about that he replied, “Because this is America. Here, right does matter.”

People in the room applauded.

Then Devin Nunes talked down to him by addressing him as “Mr. Vindman.” To that he calmly replied, “Lt. Col. Vindman, please.”

The right wing media mocked him for wearing his uniform and correcting a member of congress about how he should be addressed. Laura Ingraham said he was blinded by the spot light.

The right wing media has been accusing him of being a spy. The Republicans in Congress have questioned his loyalty because he’s an immigrant.

Devin Nunes asked Lt. Col Vindman if he wanted to plead the 5th, implying that he had committed a crime.

Gym Jordan asked him if he leaked information. To that stupid question he replied, “Never did. Never would. That is preposterous.”

New low — we’re attacking an active military hero with a purple heart for wearing his uniform and requesting he be addressed properly while testifying before Congress.

Democratic Congressman Jim Himes got pissed. He said, “The 3 minutes that were spent asking you about the offer to make you minister of defense — that may have come cloaked in a Brooks Brothers suit and parliamentary language but that was designed exclusively to give the rightwing media an opening to question your loyalties.”

Democratic Chair, Adam Schiff got pissed, too. His last words were that the Republicans only care that Trump got caught.

After his testimony, the official Twitter account of the White House put this tweet out: Tim Morrison, Alexander Vindman’s former boss, testified in his deposition that he had concerns about Vindman’s judgment.

The Army had to place Lt Col Vindman and his family under 24-hour security monitoring because the president of the United States targeted him on Twitter and the Republicans tormented him on camera.

Kurt Volker, one of the 3 Amigos, was a witness called by the Republicans and to their surprise he did a very good job of talking his way out of trouble. They didn’t expect that. Now what?

Meanwhile, Dr. Christine Blasey Ford received the ACLU’s Award for Courage, the House is investigating Trump for perjury for lying under oath in his written answers to Mueller’s questions, Trump held a televised round table praise the king cabinet meeting for himself in the White House and nobody came (nobody as in the media, he did it to take the cameras away from the hearings. Didn’t work,) Jeffrey Epstein’s guards have been charged with falsifying records, and a camel, a cow and a donkey were found traveling together, lost on a road in small town Kansas. Convinced that this was a Biblical sign, MAGAs set up folding chairs along the road to wait for Jesus to come walking down the road too. Either that or Trump. Same thing.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.