Invitation Only
Jake Angeli (aka the QAnon Shaman,) the Braveheart look alike who won’t eat jail food because it’s not organic, has asked Trump for a pardon because he only went to the Capitol because Trump invited him.
The National Mall will be closed to the public for the inauguration. Over 20,000 troops will be there. Washington DC looks like an occupied city.
The rehearsal for the inauguration has to be delayed because of security threats by domestic terrorists.
Kevin Seefried of Delaware, famous for carrying the confederate flag into the Capitol, has been arrested along with his big mouth son, Hunter.
A retired firefighter, Robert Sanford, has been arrested. He was one of the guys assaulting cops with a fire extinguisher. He took a bus from Pennsylvania to DC with a bunch of other cult members and stormed the Capitol because they were invited by the president.
Bob Good, Republican Congressman from Virginia, has a district director who was part of the MAGA mob.
Homeschool mom Laura Daube Kronen from Atlanta, Georgia took her kids to the 1776 Revolution and bragged about it on Facebook, saying that she gave her kids the best learning experience of their lives.
Christine Priola from Cleveland, Ohio, was arrested for busting into the Capitol with the MAGA mob and defacing the VP’s chair in the Senate. She was a school therapist and now she’s unemployed. She quit her job the day after the riot and said, ”I will be switching paths to expose the global evil of human trafficking and pedophilia, including in our government and children’s services agencies.” That woman should never be allowed to go near children ever again for the rest of her miserable, brain washed life.
Another national security FAIL: People on the FBI’s terrorist watch list made it to the Capitol.
“We were invited here by the president of the United States!” screamed the MAGA mob outside of the Capitol on January 6, 2021.
Newly elected psycho Lauren Boebert accused Congressman Sean Patrick Maloney of telling people that she was aiding rioters at the Capitol. He tweeted back: Um, I’ve never said your name in public. Never. Not once. (If you’re going to be a gun nut, you probably shouldn’t go off half cocked.) I’ll tweet the transcript so you can see…but that might be like “a fact”, so might not help you.
Time will tell if psycho Lauren treated insurrectionists to an invitation only tour of the Capitol the day before the riot.
Congress members are getting death threats so they’re altering their routines. Republicans are freaking out because the goons who they have been feeding bloody red meat to for decades are turning on them and might murder them (don’t bite the hand that feeds you!) It’s fine when their base threatens the media or Democratic governors, but now that they’re going after them, they’re scared. That was never part of the original plan.
Lindsey Graham went on Sean Hannity’s show and said, “If you want to end the violence, end impeachment.”
Republicans campaigned on being tough on terrorism but now that the terrorists have turned out to be them, not so much.
Movers are starting to get Trump’s shit out of the White House. Count the silver. Looters are walking out with government property in broad daylight.
More than $200,000 will be spent on janitorial services and fumigation to rid the 55,000 square foot White House of the filth and virus left behind by the grifting Trump crime family. All surfaces, carpets, furniture, light switches and door knobs will be disinfected. Everything that Trump and his lowlife gang has touched will have to be sterilized because they’re so gross.
The conspiracy theorists really believe that liberals are going to take their guns, their kids, and put them in re-education camps which is actually a pretty good idea. They’re delusional and shouldn’t have access to guns, their kids aren’t safe in their care, and they most definitely need to be re-educated (or, um, educated.)
Tubby the Tuba Tommy Tuberville, the newly elected senator from Alabammy, suggested that the inauguration be postponed because of the virus because he’s never read the constitution which specifically states that the inauguration be on January 20.
“Alabama elected an effing idiot so fucking unqualified, he hasn’t even read Senate for Dummies since winning.” — The Hoarse Whisperer
Jared and Ivanka haven’t let their Secret Service detail use any bathroom in their 6 bath house, so tax payers have been paying $3,000 a month to their neighbor for agents to be able to pee at their house.
Jared and Ivanka only have one thing on their mind today: Saving the Trump brand and being accepted back into high society.
Trump staffers can’t find new jobs. No one wants anything to do with them.
Trump can’t find a legal team to defend him in the Senate trial.
Trump put America through hell. He and his family grifted their way through 4 years of needless pain and suffering, racist provocation, destruction of our democratic institutions, lies and betrayal, severed relations with world allies, and killing people with indifference. If this were any other banana republic he’d never make it out alive but he’s headed for his private club in Florida where he’ll declare bankruptcy again and keep living like a king, still calling himself president. MAGAs won’t be of any more use to him so they won’t be invited to his private club.
Trump won’t let anybody mention Richard Nixon’s name in his presence.
Trump expects a big going away party and a military send off for his last day.
Trump will be gone in 5 days and then we’re all going to need therapy. Half of the country will need to be deprogrammed from being sucked into a cult and the other half will need treatment for PTSD.
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