MAGA Republicans’ Bad Day

Spike Dolomite
3 min readSep 22, 2022
Bill Barr should worry less about Trump’s kids and worry more about these poor kids

Trump accused Letitia James of being “racist” for suing him.

Bill Barr went on Fox and said Letitia James went too far by going after the kids. They aren’t kids. Junior is 44, Ivanka is 40, and Eric is 38. The Trump Organization is a family company and they’re all criminals.

For the first time in her life, Tiffany is happy to not be one of the kids.

Now how is Trump going to make money? Truth Social stock has lost 90% of its value. He blew through all of the money his dad left him. Sales of the red MAGA hats aren’t going to cover his lavish lifestyle. Big donors will stop giving if they know Trump has lost his power as leader of the GOP. Revenue from his memberships at his clubs and rents from his properties may decline if people decide they want nothing to do with him. The Trump brand won’t be worth anything so he won’t be able to sell it abroad to be slapped on buildings. Does he get a speakers fee from event producers for doing MAGA rallies or does he milk his campaign by calling it a campaign expense, paying himself millions to “appear?” Will he raid the trust funds for his kids? Are there even trust funds for his kids? Does he have anybody he can sue for monetary damages to bring in some fast cash? Bribes? What’s he going to do when $1 billion in loans come due next year? Selling top secrets and grifting his devotees is all he’s got.

Just when people thought the day couldn’t get any better, it did. The 11th Circuit Court of Appeals (which has a very conservative reputation) ruled in DOJ’s favor and said the DOJ could continue on with its investigation. In a 29 page opinion by a 3 judge panel (2 of them Trump appointed), the judges unanimously agreed that by interfering with the investigation Judge Cannon put the national security at risk and that Trump has no claim to any of the documents. They are NOT to be handed over to the Special Master or Trump’s attorneys. There was no callous disregard for Trump’s constitutional rights and even if Trump did wave a magic wand and declassify all of the documents it doesn’t matter because that wouldn’t change their content or render them as “personal.” They don’t belong to Trump and he suffered no harm. Game over. The DOJ investigation goes on. MAGA judge Aileen Cannon abused her authority. Her ruling holds no merit. The panel schooled her on what her job is. She needs to go back to judge school. Indictments are sure to follow.

After the news broke that he has no legal claim to the classified and top secret documents he stole, Trump was interviewed by Sean Hannity. Trump told him that as president he could declassify anything he wanted. He could even declassify stuff just by thinking about it.

The GOP accidentally showed their midterm cards by posting their inhouse platform on the GOP House website before password protecting it. People took screen shots before they realized their blunder and posted them. Their “Commitment to America” goal before the November election in 6 weeks is to double down on the extreme MAGA agenda by criminalizing abortion, slashing Medicare and repealing lower drug prices for seniors, and continue to attack democracy.

Speaking of attacking democracy, 96% of House Republicans voted against bipartisan legislation put forth by Liz Cheney and Zoe Lofgren that would make it harder to overturn future presidential elections. A bill that would prevent another insurrection got only 9 Republican votes. None of them are running for re-election.

The Select Committee has reached an agreement with another insurrectionist. Wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, Ginni Thomas, will sit for an interview in the next few weeks.

Hey MAGAs! Have a nice day!

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.