Mute the Tiny

Spike Dolomite
3 min readApr 15, 2020
Barack Obama, in a presidential 12 minute home made video, endorsed Joe Biden, thanked Bernie Sanders for being an American original and forever changing the Democratic party for the better, leaving Trump and the GOP shitting in their diaperss, crying because who’s going to change their diapers now? Anybody?

Trump fancies himself as Captain Bligh. He tweeted: Tell the Democrat Governors that “Mutiny On The Bounty” was one of my all time favorite movies. A good old fashioned mutiny every now and then is an exciting and invigorating thing to watch, especially when the mutineers need so much from the Captain. Too easy!

Captain Bligh was a tyrant who was cruel to his crew.

Governor Cuomo says Trump is clearly spoiling for a fight, but “he’s not going to get it from me.”

Trump brought coronavirus survivors to the White House for a photo op and footage for his campaign video. He asked the dumbest questions he could think of such as, “How bad was that shortness of breath? Was that noticeable? How bad was that, the shortness? So you actually had a hard time breathing? You thought you were going to die? People don’t know about Lyme disease. It’s a very bad thing.” Then he invited one of the survivors to visit the White House doctor before she left, because “they do have a very powerful antibiotic.”

If Trump had issued social distancing guidelines 2 weeks sooner, the death toll would be 90% lower.

Trump held his daily infomercial in the Rose Garden and kept everybody waiting 30 minutes so he could show everybody who was boss and make an entrance.

“Fuckin’ guy works from home, does nothing all day but watch TV and tweet, and yet he still can’t be on time for a meeting he scheduled in his own backyard? JFC.” — Jon Zal

After thanking his sponsors, Pepsi Cola, Chick-fil-A, Subway, Yum Brands, Papa John’s, etc, he said we want our sports back. “I’m tired of watching baseball games that are 14 years old,” and then he announced he was cutting off the World Health Organization. He blames them for what he did (lying and killing people) — “Those tasked with protecting us by being truthful and transparent failed to do so. It would have been so easy to be truthful. And so much death has been caused by their mistakes.”

As Trump was cutting the WHO off yesterday, the country saw its worst outbreak to date. 609,433 cases and 29,681 deaths AND COUNTING.

Every country in the world was given the same information about the coronavirus and responded accordingly, except the US.

Trump refused test kits from the WHO awhile back because he doesn’t want Americans tested.

Health experts warn that the world’s efforts to stop the coronaviarus could be stopped because of Trump cutting funding to the WHO.

The coronavirus is hitting elder care facilities exceptionally hard, killing large groups of seniors all at once. Florida won’t say which ones in their state.

Republican Indiana congressman Trey Hollingsworth says he’s willing to let more Americans die to save the economy.

70 million Americans are getting their relief checks delayed by several days because Trump wants his signature on those checks. These people don’t have direct deposit so they must wait for these checks. These are the poorest, oldest Americans who can’t afford to wait. They really need that money.

“Where you see the dying and suffering of your fellow Americans, Donald Trump sees another opportunity to promote himself — and, by extension, his reelection campaign. Corruption, you see, has its visionaries.” — Walter Shaub

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.