No White After Labor Day

Spike Dolomite
4 min readSep 3, 2018

It’s Labor Day in America and what has Trump done for the American worker? Nothing. He branded his tax give away to the rich as a gift for the middle class but paychecks are the same. MAGAs are celebrating their tax breaks even though their paychecks have stayed the same. Lock her up! Wages are stagnant and people can’t afford to pay their bills. They’re working more than one job but are still having a hard time paying the bills. Unions are weakening. People are losing their jobs because Trump’s trade wars are forcing employers to lay people off or forcing them to move out of the country to stay in business (or giving them a good excuse to ditch the American worker.)

American billionaires = Russian oligarchs. The 1% keep paying less in taxes while buying more policy and power. The MAGAs think that if they just work hard enough, they can be in the 1% club too. What the MAGAs don’t get is that members of the 1% club don’t actually work.

Unions created the middle class. They protect workers by standing up to corporate profiteering. They defend worker rights and wages. Without unions, the middle class is screwed.

MAGAs don’t get it. If they’re working full time at minimum wage and bringing home $250 a week, the problem is the wages, not the workers.

Republicans say the problem is 140 million Americans are being lazy. Democrats say the problem is that 400 Americans are being greedy.

Trump doesn’t know what Labor Day is. Why do they call it Labor Day if nobody goes to work?

If this is the best economy ever, why can’t federal employees get their raises?

TMZ and Fox News “outed” an actor working at Trader Joe’s. That poor guy was just living his life, doing his thing, working his really good day job, when along came the fake news and turned him into a story. Trader Joe’s is a great company to work for — fair pay, vacation time, health insurance, and a retirement plan. Artists like working there because TJ’s is flexible with scheduling. This guy has his great day job and is acting and teaching Shakespeare at night and now the MAGAs are laughing at him because they, like their Dear Leader, are bullies and have made him into a loser because he’s not on a hit TV sitcom anymore. First of all, he was on a hit TV sitcom and MAGAs weren’t. Second of all, He has a really great day job working for Trader Joe’s and MAGAs don’t. Third of all, he’s living a creative life and MAGAs aren’t. And last of all, TMZ and Fox News are petty, mean, and intrusive. That’s the real story — tabloid “journalism” and fake news whose mission is to crush, distort, and make MAGAs feel better about themselves. To commemorate Labor Day, give a shout out to Trader Joe’s for being pro-worker, supportive of their artist employees, and selling really great food!

While workers enjoy their day off, compliments of the unions, here’s what’s going on in Trump’s America:

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo is suing Trump for negligence for doing nothing and letting people die in Puerto Rico.

The Traitor Tots (Beavis and Butthead,) are talking to their ambulance chaser attorneys to figure a way out of going to jail. Sister Ivanka and the man she married have their fake noses out of joint because they didn’t get better seats at John McCain’s funeral.

A porn star, a Playboy bunny, and a guy named Pecker are working to out the president. TMZ and Fox News won’t be covering it.

The Kansas Supreme Court has ruled to summon a grand jury to investigate Secretary of State and wanna be Governor Kris Kobach for intentionally failing to register voters before the 2016 election. This news comes months after he lost a federal court case against the ACLU for voter fraud conspiracy. Who is Kobach working for? Russia or the Republicans?

Paul Manafort’s daughter is changing her last name.

The Republicans are hiding 100,000 pages of Brett Kavanaugh’s record and are holding his hearing tomorrow, dead set on pushing him through so Trump has a lackey on the court who will ultimately decide his fate.

Fox News’ Judge Jeanine Pirro says Trump was framed and that Jeff Sessions has no prosecutorial balls. Judge Jeanine wants to be attorney general. She has balls. Real ones.

It’s Labor Day and like every other day, the president won’t be working. He’ll be golfing and tweeting. Which tweets will be posted while pooping?

Remember — no white after Labor Day. Vote all of the pasty white, anti-union, get rich without working Republicans out in November.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.