Norway, if You’re Listening

Spike Dolomite
4 min readJun 13, 2019

--

Trump admitted in an interview with ABC’s George Stephanopoulos that if another foreign government approached him with dirt on his opponent he’d take it. He thought he was schooling George when he said, “It’s called oppo research. Everybody in Congress does it. You don’t call the FBI. They don’t have enough agents.” When George told him that FBI Director Christopher Wray told lawmakers last month that the FBI would want to know about any foreign election meddling, Trump said, “The FBI director is wrong, because frankly it doesn’t happen like that in life………You don’t call the FBI. In my whole life I’ve never called the FBI. Everybody does it. Give me a break.”

“If you’re shocked by this you haven’t read Volume 1 of the Mueller Report.” — Congresswoman Mary Gay Scanlon

The president of the United States confessed to being willing to commit a crime while sitting at the Resolute Desk in the Oval Office on camera. He incriminated himself by saying he would accept help from foreign governments to win the next election.

Nancy Pelosi should have called for impeachment last night but she didn’t, because like Mitch McConnell, she puts party above country.

The Oversight Committee voted to hold Bill Barr and Wilbur Ross in contempt of Congress which doesn’t mean a damn thing. It’s a meaningless gesture meant to placate the Democratic base who is getting more pissed off by the day. They want impeachment NOW.

Trump said he’ll sue the Democrats if they try and impeach him. He’s not only stupid enough to invite foreign governments to help him win in 2020 on national TV, he’s stupid enough to think that he can just sue the Democrats over impeachment.

Trump asserted executive privilege to block access to census documents. He’s diminishing the power of executive privilege every time he uses it because he uses it to protect himself personally.

Trump did a joint presser with the president of Poland. He rambled on and on about his polling numbers. Then he said, “Much of the media unfortunately in this country is corrupt. I have to tell you that, Mr. President.” The idiot said this, to another world leader, standing on the White House lawn, in front of cameras so the world could hear. After he bragged about his polling numbers he said the polls are fake and so is our news.

A reporter asked him about protecting North Korea, “You seem to suggest yesterday that you were essentially committed to not spying on North Korea. Is that what you meant?” Trump replied, “No, it’s not what I meant. It’s what I said. I think it’s different than maybe your interpretation.”

People want to see Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao impeached for using her power to funnel tax dollars over to her Senator husband by pulling strings and asking an employee to get him the money, but that will never happen because her Senator husband is Mitch McConnell and he controls the Senate. Nepotism under covers.

Junior testified behind closed doors yesterday. The Senate used kid gloves with him because his daddy says he’s just a boy. A good boy. A 41 year old boy with 5 kids. Disposable rubber gloves nepotism. He’d toss his own son over board along with the rubber gloves after he used them to gut him and harvest his organs to sell on the black market.

Hope Hicks agreed to testify before the House Judiciary Committee but she’ll get special treatment too — closed doors, an attorney…….5 star treatment. Pretty pink gloves to go with her pretty pink dress.

Trump is all excited because he’s got a new project — he wants to blow a bunch of money on redecorating Air Force One so that 46, 47, 48. 49, etc can take him with them wherever they go. He’s gonna rebrand the skies.

“If we really want to upset Trump we should start calling his plane Air Force Hilary Won” — The Volatile Mermaid

An artist in New York has placed 2 dozen installations of a child lying in a cage under a shiny silver thermal blanket, with audio of real children crying, on sidewalks around the city including outside of CNN, Fox News, and Newsweek.

Former Republican Congressman David Jolly of Florida said the country is begging for leadership and that Nancy Pelosi must impeach. He knows she’s tired. We’re all tired. But the president declared from the Oval Office that he is willing to commit a crime to be re-elected. He must be impeached.

“Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must undergo the FATIGUES of supporting it.” — Thomas Paine

We’re all tired. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up. Get up.

Support the Daily Crime Report on Patreon!

For a copy of the Mueller Report, click here.

For a list of attorneys giving legal analysis about the imploding Trump presidency on Twitter, click here.

For the best journalists to follow on Twitter, click here.

For straight news, check out these reliable sources on Twitter.

The Daily Crime Reports are being published as “quarterly reports” (three month groups) as part of “The Treason Chronicles” on Amazon for Kindle. To purchase one or more quarters, click here.

--

--

Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

No responses yet