Open for Business!

Spike Dolomite
4 min readMay 21, 2020

Trump has decided to drop out of the Open Skies Treaty which was negotiated 3 decades ago to allow nations to make observation flights over each other’s territory with elaborate sensor equipment to make sure that nobody was preparing for military action. The whole idea behind the treaty was to promote trust and avert conflict between nations. This just makes it more official that the world can’t trust the US. It’s business as usual in Trump’s America.

2.4 million more people filed for unemployment last week bringing the new total of unemployed Americans to 40 million. Mitch McConnell says the next bill won’t have any extended benefits for those who have lost their jobs. He and his party only care about employers. The GOP is sticking to its brand, “pro-business” as in business owners.

After this is all over, assuming we make it, unions need to make a come back and become stronger than ever because without them, Republicans will continue to let workers starve and die.

Trump is supposed to go to a Ford plant in Michigan today. The state’s attorney general has sent him an open letter reminding him that wearing a mask is the law and that it’s his “moral” responsibility to wear one. Will Trump be telling Michigan to mind its own business?

Who is that unmasked man? Why, It’s Mike Pence doing a photo op, sitting at a table inside a burger joint in Flori-duh, about to eat! Hey everybody! We’re open for business!

YEEHAW! The Texas GOP is fixin’ to proceed with its huge convention in Houston in July. It’s OK, nature will sort them out. Don’t mess with Texas.

Dozens of white people gave each other free haircuts on Michigan’s capitol lawn to protest the state’s coronavirus stay at home order. When their grand kids ask them what they did during the Make America Great Depression, what will they tell them? I fought for, and got, a free haircut?

States that have rushed to reopen are going to see a huge surge in coronavirus cases within the next 4 weeks. Alabama’s healthcare system is already maxed out. It’s OK. Let nature sort them out.

“50 states reopening too soon to be safe suggests that none of these governors have ever seen Jaws.” — Bryan Behar

Mass shootings have picked up since people are free now to leave their houses with their guns. There was a shooting at the Westgate Entertainment District in Glendale, Arizona (AR-15 — the fun gun!) and right now there is an active shooter at the Naval Air Station in Corpus Christ, Texas. America is back to business as usual.

Gun nuts are sitting back in their comfortable comfort zone, guns in their laps, down their pants, under their mattresses, laying out in the open on their coffee tables, and in their glove compartments, safe in the knowledge that people are free to second amendment each other once again. These guys think that kids going to school with bullet proof backpacks to be met by metal detectors and armed guards on campus and then later subjected to active shooter drills must pay the price for freedom but yet they won’t wear a mask to go to the grocery store because that’s tyranny.

Speaking of hypocritical assholes, the people who raise hell when a bakery is boycotted for not baking a cake for a gay couple because it’s the baker’s right not to are the same people raising hell over a bakery refusing to let anybody inside if they’re not wearing a mask because not wearing a mask is their right and if you make them wear a mask that’s tyranny!

America is stupid.

95,057 Americans are dead. We’re going to hit the grim milestone of 100,000 deaths very soon. We have yet to recognize and mark this tragedy as a nation. People have been denied the opportunity to mourn as a community. Grief, fear, anxiety, stress……’s just out there, floating with nowhere to land. We’re on our own, all alone.

A group of community organizers and faith leaders is taking turns reciting the names of those who have died of the coronavirus in a 24 hour marathon. Our government should be doing this but our government doesn’t care. Our government is stupid. Our government kills people.

Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer wrote Trump to ask him to order all public buildings to fly their flags at half staff after the death toll hits 100,000 because it’s the least he could do and he would never think of that himself.

Speaking of heartless, devious Republicans, where are all of the fanatical, die hard, foaming at the mouth Hillary hating Republicans who turned the deaths of 4 people in Benghazi into a huge scandal?

“Not sure I’ll ever be able to wrap my mind around the worldview that, after 100,000 deaths during two months of lockdown, all of this was unwarranted hysteria it honestly makes me nauseous that people with influence peddle this shit and still find a way to sleep at night” — Dylan Scott

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.