President’s Day
It’s Presidents Day so Trump is taking the day off. He won’t be talking to reporters or doing any work. So Presidents Day really is pretty much like any other day. The rest of us are going to blow the day off because we don’t have anything or anyone to celebrate.
Trump wished everybody Happy President’s Day in a tweet. If he was a smart president who could spell, most people would read into that that he thinks it’s his day. But since he’s an idiot we won’t read anything more into it other than Trump is an acting president and his presidency is nothing more than a pyramid scheme.
America is taking it one president’s day at a time, hoping behind hope that we’ll have a real president soon.
Trump needs President’s Day off after his big day at the races yesterday. He said a few words — “NASCAR fans never forget that no matter who wins the race, what matters most is God, family, and country.” Guys holding the cue cards with the prompt, “Drivers — start your engines!” were sweating and praying, “Don’t screw this up don’t screw this up don’t screw this up.” Drivers — start your penguins!
Trump’s campaign manager put out an image of the president’s plane, Air Force One, flying right over the NASCAR crowd and took it down 3 hours later after he got busted for posting a photo from 2004 when Bush flew over Daytona 500.
Trump is annoyed that he can’t shoot off fireworks at Mt Rushmore for environmental reasons. Why not? “What can burn? It’s stone.” The criminal president wants to shoot fireworks off of former presidents’ heads while the band plays Hail to the Thief.
Stephen Miller got married at Trump’s hotel. Their first dance as husband and White Housewife was to the tune of “White Wedding.”
Conspiracy theorist Arkansas Senator Tom Cotton is spreading the rumor that the coronavirus originated in a high-security biochemical lab in China. Not true. These guys lie as often as the American people worry about what the president is going to do next.
Bullies attacked an Asian American teen at school because they said he had the coronavirus. The president attacks people of color so why can’t we?
The president of the United States is not held to the highest standard. He’s not held to ANY standard.
President says what? President says huh? President says I’m gonna bomb the shit out of them.
“The president of the united states is retweeting farts, so I guess what I want to know is WHY THE FUCK DO WE EVEN HAVE A 25TH AMENDMENT IF WE’RE NEVER GOING TO USE IT” — Jeff Tiedrich
Looks like Season 3 of the Reality TV President may loop and loop and never end.
Most presidents’ worst fears have had to do with national security. Trump’s worst fears are that he will be found to be an illegitimate president and everybody will find out he’s not rich and he’ll be exposed for being nothing but a scumbag conman who fell ass backwards into the presidency.
Trump never wanted to be president but he needs this job so taxpayers can fund his lavish phony billionaire lifestyle. Plus if he loses this job he could get arrested and end up in jail. 2020 presidential campaign bumper stickers should read, “Keep Trump out of jail 2020” because that’s the real contest.
Since Bill Barr thinks the president IS the executive branch then we should be wishing everybody “Happy Executive Branch Day” today.
This should be a day of mourning.
This is unpresidented.
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For a list of attorneys giving legal analysis about the imploding Trump presidency on Twitter, click here.
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