Run and Hide

Spike Dolomite
4 min readJul 17, 2019

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The House voted on a historic resolution to censure Trump “for his racist and xenophobic comments” about Congresswomen Omar, Ocasio-Cortez, Tlaib and Pressley. Only one US president, Andrew Jackson, was ever censured and that happened in 1834. Trump loves Andrew Jackson. He’s got a portrait of him in his office that he’s had people of color who were being honored strategically placed in front of during press conferences in the White House.

Nancy Pelosi kicked the vote off by saying a few blunt words which Doug Collins tried to combat with her breaking some sort of stupid rule. She lacked “decorum.” Meanwhile, his staffer stood right next to him with his tongue poking out at her while Collins whined about civility. She and the parliamentarian walked off to applause.

The resolution passed. Only 4 Republicans voted to condemn the racist president — Will Hurd, Fred Upton, Brian Fitzpatrick, and Susan Brooks (who that the least to lose since she’s not running for re-election.) The 3 men are sitting ducks. Trump is going to tweet at them. Justin Amash voted yes but he left the Republican party and voted as an Independent. Trump has already tweeted at him and he doesn’t care.

Republican hypocrite fun fact: Republicans are racist.

Kevin McCarthy does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Matt Gaetz does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Liz Cheney does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Mark Meadows does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Louie Gohmert does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Jim Jordan does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Devin Nunes does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Steve Scalise does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from.”

Steve King does not believe it is racist to tell American people of color to “go back where they came from,” but we knew that already.

Trump is the most racist president in history.

Mitch McConnell talked to the press, flanked by the old white man posse that’s always with him and said, “The president is not a racist.” His wife is a Chinese immigrant. He wouldn’t answer when asked what he’d do if Trump told her to go back to where she came from.

Mitch McConnell’s family owned slaves.

Kellyanne Conway defended Trump and called the 4 congresswomen of color a very dark element in this country. Then she asked the Jewish reporter, “what’s your ethnicity?”

A Jewish activist group called, “Never Again Action” shut down every point to the Department of Homeland Security headquarters in Washington DC. A dozen got arrested. The Jews know better than anybody what’s going on here.

Trump has a MAGA rally scheduled for tonight in Greenville, North Carolina. He scheduled it to distract from Mueller’s testimony which was supposed to happen today but got postponed. Will he do it in blackface? Every single MAGA in attendance tonight is going to have a hard on for Make America White Again and will want to see blood. They’re going to egg him on and since he’s so weak and needy he’ll give them what they want and take this up another notch, endangering more people.

Trump is calling citizens un-American when he’s never defended us against an attack by Russia.

Trump is a white nationalist and has conquered the Republican party.

Trump is working towards having no Senate-confirmed cabinet secretaries so he can have more control.

This is fascism.

Trump is not running for a second term because he really wants the job. He doesn’t do anything. He’s running because he needs the job. As long as he’s president, he’s untouchable.

He can run but he can’t hide.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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