The Worst is Yet to Come

Spike Dolomite
3 min readMar 12, 2020

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Pence held a coronavirus meeting and wouldn’t let the press in. Then Trump addressed the nation and made everything worse. He was flippant before and after he started reading the teleprompter. His big announcement was that he was stopping air travel to Europe which was news to Europe so now Europe is pissed off. He also claimed that health insurers agreed to waive all copayments for coronavirus treatments which is news to the insurance companies so now the insurance companies are pissed off.

He said that the ban will apply to the “tremendous amount” of trade and cargo from Europe. The White House says that’s not true.

There are no travel bans to and from South Korea. Or China. The Republicans have been praising Trump for suspending travel to China but he didn’t suspend travel to China and there are still planes landing in the US from…..China.

Kevin McCarthy lied and said that Democrats are trying to keep Trump — or any future president — from being able to swiftly issue travel restrictions in the face of health threats like coronavirus.

Earlier in the day, Trump tweeted: Someone needs to tell the Democrats in Congress that CoronaVirus doesn’t care what party you are in. We need to protect ALL Americans!…….. I am fully prepared to use the full power of the Federal Government to deal with our current challenge of the CoronaVirus!,,,,,,,,,,

Senate Republicans have blocked an emergency paid sick leave bill. They need to make sure there’s plenty of tax payer money left for them to give to the oil and travel industries because they’re “hurting.”

Trump didn’t mention anything about public safety, free testing, paid sick leave or the virus already being here.

He tweeted about payroll cuts.

“The lack of testing should be a career ending mistake. I’ve never seen Dow futures plummet like that when a President speaks. People need testing, social distancing, beds, respirators, good advice, food, paid leave, oxygen tanks, and scientific integrity, not a payroll tax cut.” — Senator Brian Schatz

Joel Osteen won’t be cancelling his Megachurch service this Sunday. No way! Do you know how much money he would lose if 50,000 people didn’t gather to worship him?

Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson are in Australia now and both have tested positive for the coronavirus. They would not have qualified for a test in America.

The Golden State Warriors will play home games without fans.

A coronavirus conference got cancelled because of the coronavirus.

Seattle has closed public schools for 2 weeks.

The outbreak has reached the Arctic, affecting a huge science expedition that’s spending a year locked in the sea ice.

While in self quarantine, Ted Cruz is politicizing the coronavirus by blaming the Democrats and the media for politicizing the coronavirus. “The media’s gleeful to see the President stumble.” It’s not like he was serving bat soup in the Wuhan province. The media wants it to be Katrina!

Pence is on the TV this morning doing damage control trying to spin that Trump didn’t mean what he said last night.

The World Health Organization has a strong warning for the world: the coronavirus is a pandemic. The director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, Dr. Anthony Fauci has a strong warning for Americans — “If we are complacent and don’t do really aggressive containment and mitigation, the number could go way up…many, many millions…….the bottom line is that it’s going to get worse.”

The worst is yet to come.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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