Trump Water

Spike Dolomite
4 min readAug 2, 2024

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Trump posted a copy of Kamala Harris’s birth certificate on Truth Social to prove that she isn’t Black and his campaign displayed headlines on their video board ahead of a rally he did in Pennsylvania that showed Kamala Harris as “the first sworn in as one of the first Indian American senators.” He’s doing the birther thing all over again with her now. She’s not a real American. She’s not white and she won’t drink from the Trump tap.

Fox News is struggling to understand the concept of being biracial. There can’t be two sides to a person. You have to be one or the other. White nationalists won’t accept white people mixing with nonwhite people. Whites must stay as pure as Junior’s coke.

“Republicans went from claiming they are colorblind to now claiming they can determine who is really Black.” — Ibram X. Kendi

The Harris campaign responsed to Trump’s despicable performance at the National Association of Black Journalists by making a statement: “The hostility Donald Trump showed on stage today is the same hostility he has shown throughout his life, throughout his term in office, and throughout his campaign for president as he seeks to regain power and inflict his harmful Project 2025 agenda on the American people. Trump lobbed personal attacks and insults at Black journalists the same way he did throughout his presidency — while he failed Black families and left the entire country digging out of the ditch he left us in. Donald Trump has already proven he cannot unite America, so he attempts to divide us.”

There were Black people everywhere at the National Association of Black Journalists which made him extremely uncomfortable. He had a hard time with the moderator, Rachel Scott, because she got to ask him, the real president, questions. He can’t be upstaged by an educated, professional, prepared Black woman. He’s used to being in the driver’s seat even when he’s not driving. She wouldn’t let him drive which made him really mad. She showed the world how it’s done — a journalist asking real tough, pointed questions without letting herself be talked over or derailed. He did everything he could to put her in her place, including grabbing her bottle of water and tightening it real tight so if she got dry mouth while doing her job she’d embarrass herself trying to open her water bottle. The interview didn’t go long enough for her to get dry mouth. His team yanked him off the stage fast but not fast enough. The damage was done. They should have never let him do the interview in the first place. Now they should hide him but they can’t. He’s got to campaign for president.

ABC should put Rachel Scott in charge of the presidential debate on September 10. She should be the one to ask all the questions and she should do it with several bottles of water in front of her that she takes a sip from them easily and often.

Liberals who have been abandoned by MSNBC have a new Rachel. Rachel Scott!

One of the largest international prisoner exchanges since the Cold War has been in the works with Russia. While the media has been hammering on Biden for being an old fart who should be let out to pasture, Biden has been busy making history again. One of the 16 prisoners was a reporter for the Wall Street Journal, Evan Gershkovich. Way to go, old rich fart Rupert Murdoch, the owner of both the Wall Street Journal and Fox News, you should be let out to pasture and never let back in. President Biden and Vice President Harris greeted Evan along with former US Marine Paul Whelan and Alsu Kurmasheva, a Russian-American journalist at Joint Base Andrews. The masterful diplomatic negotiation was conducted by the Biden administration as the media obsessively called him too old, and panicked Democrats threw empty water bottles at him. The attacks and criticism were relentless and undeserved. He’ll probably get a Nobel Peace Prize for this. He and Jill should get to go skinny dipping in the Sea of Galilee after this but the media would focus on what he looked like naked instead of the miracle that he negotiated.

While the agony of the prisoners is over, ours is not. It won’t be over until Trump is put out to pasture once and for all. Like a mediocre guitar player listening to a master guitar player slay, Trump said, “I could do that” when he found out the prisoners had been released. Biden’s response was, “Why didn’t you?” When asked if getting shot at had changed him and made him want to be a better person, Trump said no, it made him worse.

Remember Trump brand bottled water? He sent a couple of cases to Texas and Puerto Rico after hurricanes had made their drinking water unpotable. He probably charged them for it.

Trump uses both hands when he drinks water. Trump gives new meaning to “two fisted drinker.” If he wins and Project 2025 is implemented all the way, he can pee in his water before he bottles it and there’s not a damn thing the government can do about it.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.

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