We’re Gonna Need a Bigger Jail

Spike Dolomite
3 min readNov 10, 2021

A judge has rejected Trump’s request to block the Select Committee from accessing his White House records on and before the insurrection. She said that Biden’s decision to release them is more significant. “Presidents are not kings, and Plaintiff is not President.”

“They suggest that President Trump was personally involved in the planning and execution of January 6th. And this Committee will get to the bottom of that.” — Congresswoman Liz Cheney

10 more subpoenas have gone out to members of Trump’s inner circle. Press Secretary Barbie Kayleigh McEnany, Stephen Miller AKA Satan, and party boy/HR manager John McEntee are among them. They have until November 23 to give the Select Committee the documents they requested.

Mike Pence, his aides and staff were locked out of their offices at the Capitol and the VP Office Complex, plus the White House during the attack at the Capitol. None of their key cards worked. They had all been deactivated. Pence and his team huddled on a loading dock frantically trying to figure out what to do and how to remove Trump from power. The Secret Service wanted to take Pence away but he refused because he knew what would happen. He told the agent who asked him to go, “I trust you, Tim, but you’re not driving the car. If I get in that vehicle, you guys are taking off. I’m not getting in the car.” The White House photographer snapped pictures of him reading Trump’s tweets in real time and now Pence is trying to block them from becoming public.

“You don’t know the position I’m in.” — Mike Pence

Mike Pence was supposed to die that day.

Reminder: Congresswoman Ayanna Presley’s panic button in her office was deactivated during the attack and phone wires had been pulled from the wall in another office that Senator Patty Murray found refuge in.

The attack on the Capitol was a coordinated attack that came from within the White House that included at least one person in the highest level of security.

While the news of Pence and his team losing access was leaking out, the Justice Department asked the court to limit cross examination of high level Secret Service members. They want to limit questions about the loading dock and any other locations that Pence was taken to during the attack. They don’t want the Select Committee to interfere with the federal investigation by making things public too soon.

Did you hear that, nervous Nellies? The DOJ is on the case. People are going nuts wanting to see Merrick Garland hang people by the balls in the town square. Take a chill pill, nervous Nellies. Garland’s got them by the balls.

Prosecuting Trump is not going to happen as fast as people think it should. First, justice is designed to be slow in America to guarantee a fair trial. Second, this case involves the former president of the United States so they’re dotting their i’s and crossing their t’s three times to make sure their case is air tight. Third, Merrick Garland has only been on the job for 8 months and has been having to assess, coordinate, and prosecute the biggest criminal case in the history of the country PLUS he has to clean up the corruption in the department left by Trump. They’re building their case, slowly but surely, but outside of the public eye. The higher they go with indictments the more they’ll need the testimonies of everybody that testified before them. They’re all going down.

“We’re gonna need a bigger jail.” — Rick Wilson

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.