What’s in a Word

Spike Dolomite
4 min readOct 19, 2019

Word on the street is Trump is threatening to sue CNN. Good idea.

Words we never heard of until Trump became president: quid pro quo, golden showers, emolument clause, 25th amendment, malignant narcissist, Einstein visa, sycophant.

Words politicians should never be allowed to use ever again: Deeply concerning, deeply disturbing, deeply troubling, unprecedented, profoundly upsetting, let me be clear, make no mistake, what Americans want is, shameful, thoughts and prayers.

Words journalists should stop using now: Hearsay, fabrications, disinformation, false claims, misleading claims.

Words that should be plucked out of MAGAs’ tiny, calcified, unused, defective brains: Obama, Hillary, Bill Clinton.

The word that needs to be replaced with a stronger word because we’re living in a time that is not to be believed: Fuck. How about MAGA butt fuck shortened to MAGA BF in texts and Twitter? That’s pretty strong and shocking and since it doesn’t roll right off the tongue you’ll need to say it deliberately, like you really mean it.

Yesterday was the deadline for Mike Mulvaney and Rick Perry to comply with congressional subpoenas. They both blew it off because they’re MAGA BFs.

Rudy hasn’t said a word in a couple of days. He must have a lawyer.

“The only time I feel a little hopeful about the reputation of those who stand with Trump is that the people who stood with Hitler are still seen as pieces of shit 70+ years later.” — Oliver Willis

Where’s Kellyanne? Under the couch? Under the bus? Under a house? Getting a kidney transplant? What’s the word?

Now that the US State Department has finished its investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails and concluded that she did nothing wrong, do you think that Trump, Fox, and the Republicans will stop talking about them or will they keep going for the last word, working Hillary’s emails into every stupid MAGA BF point they ever make?

81 year old Jane Fonda, inspired by Greta Thunberg’s words and actions, has moved to DC so she can get herself arrested every Friday on the steps of the Capitol for protesting inaction on climate change.

In addition to red MAGA hats, Trump’s campaign is selling Sharpiegate markers, “Own the Libs” straws, and “Where’s Hunter?” and “Get Over It” t-shirts.

Rashida Tlaib’s campaign is selling ”Impeach the Mother Fucker” t-shirts.

“It is now been approximately a year since QAnon promised us mass arrests. Somehow, I still managed to go to the post office, Trader Joe’s, and Costco today without being swept up in the dragnet.” — Rick Wilson

Republican hypocrite fun fact: North Dakota Senator Ken Cramer said, “It may seem careless politically, but on the other hand there’s tremendous integrity in his boldness and his transparency” regarding Trump awarding himself a government contract to hold the G7 summit at his own Miami club.

Over half of voters think Trump not only needs to be impeached, but he needs to be kicked out of the White House.

Hold on! What’s the word on Main Street? What does “Real America” think? Over fed white people in diners who watch Fox News and go to county fairs and eat deep fried Oreos, Twinkies and canned meat haven’t weighed in yet.

The White House has a bowling alley. It got new balls. They are embossed with the words, “The President’s House.”

Some small towns in Texas are calling themselves sanctuary cities for the unborn because you know, The Word.

George Washington’s famous words: I cannot tell a lie.

JFK’s famous words: Ask not what your country can do for you — ask what you can do for your country.

Abraham Lincoln’s famous words: We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.

Citizen Cain Trump’s famous last words: Rose butt fuck.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.