Work It

Spike Dolomite
4 min readMay 7, 2020


Trump is working! He’s working over time to deflect and blame everybody else for 75,000 dead Americans. “This virus is going to disappear. This is worst attack we’ve ever had. This is worse than Pearl Harbor and it should’ve never happened.” Got it. We were attacked — out of the blue. We’ve been hit. This is war. Will it work?

Trump’s next move is to claim that the death toll numbers are fake which will be easy because MAGAs already don’t believe the death toll numbers. They think that the media is conspiring with liberals to invent a health crisis just to take their liberty and eventually their guns. It won’t work!

Trump has moved on to sacrificing children. He wants schools to open. “You realize how strong children are, right? Their immune system is maybe a little bit different. Maybe just a little bit stronger. Or maybe it’s a lot stronger, right. Could be a lot stronger.”

If they don’t go back to school then perhaps we should put them to work like they did in the good old days before schools and unions.

Like everything else he does, Trump took back his decision to wind down his coronavirus task force — “I thought we could wind it down sooner. But I had no idea how popular the task force is until actually yesterday when I started talking about winding it down.” Looks like the task force is working for him.

“I don’t understand why everyone is saying Trump has no COVID strategy. Of course he has a strategy. It just doesn’t involve helping you.” — Joshua Potash

Trump doesn’t work for the American people. The white dumb ones in red states think he does, but he doesn’t work for anyone. He doesn’t work. He crimes.

3.2 million more Americans applied for unemployment last week. The total number of unemployment claims has hit 33 million. Is he worried about it? Nah. “It is what it is.” Does he accept any blame for that? Nah. “They’re not blaming me. You know, very interesting. Nobody’s blaming me for that.”

He’s not worried about people being out of work and he’s not worried about the economy, either. “I built it once. I can build it again.” He didn’t build anything. He inherited a good economy like he did his personal fortune and then slapped his name on it like he does his buildings and then took credit for it. That’s what he does. HE DOESN’T WORK.

His lack of comprehension, lack of empathy, obsession with self, and his combined arrogance and ignorance has destroyed the US economy and killed tens of thousands of people, so far.

Trump is now in control of the US Postal Service. The new postmaster general is Louis DeJoy, the head of fundraising for the North Carolina RNC. He raises money for Trump. He works for Trump.

Trump invited nurses into the Oval Office for a photo op for National Nurses Day. When a nurse respectfully told Trump that “PPE has been sporadic, but it’s been manageable,” he crossed his arms defiantly like a spoiled brat little boy and said, “Sporadic for you, but not sporadic for a lot of other people. That was fine, but I have heard we have a tremendous supply to almost all places.” He told her to get back to work with his eyes.

One of Trump’s personal valets has tested positive for the coronavirus.

Coronavirus fatality fun fact: 20,000 more Americans have died in 2 months from the coronavirus than die every year from the flu.

COVID-19 is not the flu.

“We’re reopening the country but we still don’t have a vaccine, a treatment or a cure. We don’t have wide spread testing or tracing. We just have a president who’s bored with staying in the White House and worried that if he can’t juice the economy he won’t get reelected.” — Molly Jong-Fast

Trump had a head start in dealing with a possible pandemic because of what Obama had put in place. He blew it up. Trump has been given the advice he needs as president by the nation’s top disease experts and he shelved it, denied it, and got rid of anybody who tried to warn the public.

“Donald Trump isn’t president to help anyone. He’s not interested in saving lives or marshaling resources to fight a pandemic. Donald Trump is president to deal a death blow to government as an obstacle to overt corruption and obscene profit. That’s it.” — Jared Yates Sexton

Listen up white people in red states — Trump isn’t your president. He’s been working you. Trump isn’t the president of anybody.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.