Ya Well, We’re Fucked

Spike Dolomite
2 min readDec 17, 2024

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Trump is calling for “patriotic education” and says teaching anti-racism is child abuse. Hitler did the same thing. He had Hitler Youth, the youngest members of the Nazi party. We’re fucked.

Trump says he’s going to target social media influencers who are critical of him along with newspapers and media companies. We’re fucked.

There was another school shooting in Wisconsin yesterday — 6 dead and several injured. It happened at a K-12 Christian school with about 400 students. A second grader called 911 to report the shooting. We knew how sick our society was when kids started shooting their classmates at school a generation ago but the Republicans wouldn’t do anything about it. Now Trump has been elected for a second time. Everything he did was criminal and un-American yet it was endorsed, protected and pushed along by the Republicans. Buckle up. We haven’t seen anything yet. Billionaires control our government, economy, health care system, and the media. All they care about is grabbing more power and money for themselves. The only thing we have left is Revolution but half the country is wasted on hatred, white supremacy, and volunteered mass ignorance so we’re fucked.

Steve Bannon wants Trump to run again in 2028 since his two terms were not consecutive. Oh gawd, no. We’re fucked.

Democrats will continue to play by very old rules and polite, virtuous customs which will only let the enemy advance further. We’re fucked.

Trump is filling his cabinet with criminals and billionaires who have absolutely no interest and are not at all qualified to govern. We’re fucked.

There aren’t enough white women to destroy the patriarchy because they benefit from it. We’re fucked.

Trump is about to deport a significant portion of the workforce to satisfy the racists’ need to cleanse America from brown people. We’re fucked.

The culture wars that Republicans started to keep the masses busy and preoccupied have no end in sight. We’re fucked.

The new Health and Human Services department is set to roll back all of the medical advances since eradicating polio, endangering millions based on crackpot conspiracy theories. We’re fucked.

Trump won in states where lots of top Democrats won which means people voted for Democrats AND Trump or something else is at play. Election interference happened right out in the open and was barely challenged. We’re fucked.

Christianity is on track to being the official state religion. We’re fucked.

Democracies in other parts of the world are failing. We’re fucked.

The price of eggs will go up, not down, dummies who say they voted for eggs. Thanks a lot. We’re fucked.

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Spike Dolomite
Spike Dolomite

Written by Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns.

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