Back In The USSR Timeline Part 1 — “Putin’s Puppet”

Spike Dolomite
4 min readFeb 26, 2022

Trump was co-owner of the Miss Universe pageant which was held in Moscow in 2013. He was negotiating a deal with the Russian producers of the pageant to build a Trump Tower in Moscow in 2014 but the project fizzled out after the real estate market tanked due to sanctions that the US put on Russia after it invaded Crimea and the Putin puppet president of Ukraine got run out of the country by the people because they wanted to be a democracy. Trump picked the idea back up again with different “investors” after he decided to run for president. To sweeten the deal, he offered Putin a free penthouse in Trump Tower which violated the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act, which bans American companies from bribing foreign officials. Robert Mueller would later investigate this and conclude that Trump didn’t collude with Russia to steal the election, he just colluded with Russia to get more rich.

Prior to this, the Trump Organization had been making deals with Russian oligarchs for decades, laundering money for them through his properties. In 2008, Donald Trump, Jr said “In terms of high-end product influx into the US, Russians make up a pretty disproportionate cross-section of a lot of our assets. We see a lot of money pouring in from Russia.”

In December 2015, retired United States Army lieutenant general Michael Flynn was hanging out in Moscow, a few months before the Republican primaries.

After resigning themselves to the inevitable fact that Trump was going to win the primary and be the Republican nominee for president, Kevin McCarthy was caught on tape telling other Republicans that he thought Trump was being paid by Putin. Speaker Paul Ryan was there, too and told everybody to keep their mouths shut.

During Trump’s presidential campaign, his team reached out to the Russians at least 18 times. One meeting took place in Trump Tower under the guise of “Russian adoptions” but the real reason was the Russians were offering the Trump campaign dirt on Hillary. In the meeting were Jared Kushner, Paul Manafort and Junior. Trump lied and said he knew nothing about it but Michael Cohen confirmed that he did after Trump threw him under the bus. Putin’s best friend and political emissary, Viktor Medvedchuk, was in contact with Trump’s campaign between April — November 2016. The FBI learned of this and let Obama know. Since everybody thought Hillary was going to win, Obama opted not to do anything because it would look like he was trying to help her win. Former CIA chief John Brennan briefed Congressional leaders a few months before the election. The Democrats wanted to go public but the Republicans said NO WAY. For Mitch McConnell’s support, his wife was rewarded with a job as Transportation Secretary in Trump’s administration which made the McConnells even richer than they already were working for the US government because her dad was a Chinese shipping magnate.

Trump’s campaign manager, Paul Manafort left the campaign after the media found out that he had worked for a pro-Russian political party in Ukraine.

To everybody’s horror, Trump won and he made Mike Flynn his national security advisor. Four days after the inauguration, Mike Flynn was questioned by the FBI about his loyalty to Russia and taking money from them. A week and a half after that, Sally Yates, the acting Attorney General, went to the White House to tell Trump that Flynn was a Russian spy. He fired her and kept Mike Flynn on for another 18 days. During that time he sat in on a number of national security meetings and spoke directly to Putin. Flynn resigned after he was outed. He refused to comply with a Senate subpoena and pleaded guilty to lying to the FBI. He’s a traitor to the United States, a felon, and Trump pardoned him.

Mike Flynn started the whole “Lock her up!” chant when he spoke at the Republican National Convention in 2016. MAGAs still chant it today.

After firing Sally Yates, Trump made Jeff Sessions (“I have been called a surrogate at a time or two in that campaign and I did not have communications with the Russians”) his attorney general. Jeff Sessions recommended that Trump fire the head of the FBI, Jim Comey, for investigating him and Russia after he was at a meeting with them at the White House and was asked to leave the room so Trump could ask Comey to drop the investigation. Jim Comey was fired along with everybody who investigated Trump and the Republicans went along with it.

Devin Nunes was the head of an oversight committee that was supposed to investigate everybody who was investigating Trump. He would run and tell Trump what he heard which put him under investigation but nothing came of it because the Republicans were in control and covered for him. They didn’t do anything about Trump refusing to hand over documents to the oversight committee on Mike Flynn either. Devin Nunes was later rewarded by being given the job of CEO of Trump’s new social media company, “Truth.”

Russia is the enemy fun fact: Putin was scared shitless of Hillary Clinton.

Hillary called Trump, “Putin’s Puppet.”

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.