Dumbing US Down

Spike Dolomite
5 min readApr 19, 2022

Two years after MAGAs started drinking bleach because Trump told them to, they have taken to radiating their balls. Tucker Carlson is having some fun with his audience by seeing if they’ll take the bait that gives them something to blame for their own impotence. The latest episode of his “Originals” series puts the blame for their whithered libido and low testosterone on the libs. His show was homo erotic and well received. First the feminists took their pride, then the immigrants took their jobs, the Democrats took Christmas, Biden took their money, the Blacks are trying to take their white, and now the libtards have taken their testosterone. Tucker says that they might be able to get some back if they tan their testicles. Emergency rooms are going to start filling up with MAGAs with sunburned nuts. If the red hat doesn’t give the stupidity away, the red burnt balls will.

Trump has endorsed Republican candidate JD Vance for US Senate in Ohio. Vance’s former roommate just revealed texts where he told him, “We are the party of lower-education white people… Trump is the fruit of the [GOP]’s collective neglect.” He also said that Trump may be “America’s Hitler.” Marjorie Taylor Greene endorsed him, too. After he got her blessing, he tweeted: “Honored to have Marjorie’s endorsement. We’re going to win this thing and take the country back from the scumbags.” Soon after she endorsed him she spoke at a white supremacist rally. When asked if he would condemn her for doing that he said, “She is my friend, and she did nothing wrong……I’m absolutely not going to throw her under the bus, or anybody else who is a friend of mine.” When asked to comment about the war in Ukraine he said, “I think it’s ridiculous that we are focused on this border in Ukraine. I got to be honest with you, I don’t really care what happens to Ukraine one way or the other.” If these were normal times he’d have to drop out of the race, but since this is the Trump era, he’ll surely get the dumb dumb MAGA vote and if Democrats don’t get off their butts and vote, he could win.

Governor Greg Abbott is on a roll (pun intended) with his plan to bring the border to Biden. He says he’s going to send every migrant who crosses the border to DC. Once they fill DC up with “illegal immigrants” he’ll dump them off in Delaware to own the libs. Pretty dumb thing to say, let alone do.

Governor Ron DeSantis didn’t want to be out-dumbed by Abbott so he and the Republicans banned 54 math textbooks claiming that they push critical race theory. That’s the dumbest thing smart people have ever heard. Critical race theory isn’t being taught in K-12 schools anywhere nor will it ever be. It’s a college class for law students. Republican voters in Florida are too dumb to know that.

Abbott and DeSantis, the Dumb and Dumber of the National Governors Association.

Now that Republicans have succeeded in getting books removed from public school shelves, they’re going after public libraries. Their mission is to dumb down America. They’ve done a pretty good job so far but they’re not done.

Hundreds of text messages have revealed the coordination between the Proud Boys and the Oath Keepers working together to plan the attack on January 6. Trump’s former drunk doctor and now drunk congressman, Ronny Jackson, may be wrapped up in the Attack of the Dumb Asses. One text read, “Ronnie Jackson office inside Capitol — he needs OK help. Anyone inside?”

Ronny Jackson is under investigation by the Ethics Committee for misusing campaign funds. He’s a real kook. He has been ranting about wanting Biden to take a cognitive test because he says Biden is a kook. He claims that the Democrats are concocting a new medical term variant of covid (wut?) When he spoke at the Faith and Freedom Coalition summit, he admitted to the crowd that Republicans were in control of redistricting. “That alone should get us the majority back.” That’s a dumb thing to admit to publicly but it won’t hurt him or the GOP.

Kimberly Guilfoyle met with Select Committee. The committee has saved the worst for last to catch the dumbshits in their lies. They already have everything they need.

The GOP won’t be doing any debates this year because their candidates are too dumb, sexist, racist, homophobic, and totally unqualified to run for office. They don’t want voters to hear them talk. The only three debates that they have agreed to do are in the Deep South with Fox News moderators because the Republican voters down South are too dumb to be shocked or disgusted.

Fox News has been dumbing their audience down for decades. Social media accelerated things for them. Their people have no idea what’s really going on. Other people who get a whiff of their stink just check out. The citizenry is anything but we’ll informed and that’s all by Republican design. Their original plan was to dupe their voters into believing that they were smart and powerful and knew more than Democrats, doctors, scientists and the New York Times. Now they’re doing it to keep their duped followers in their place so they can remain in power.

How dumb do you have to be to take the Hillary and Hunter bait EVERY SINGLE TIME? About as dumb as you’d have to be to burn your own balls to own the libs.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.