New Face of the Republican Party

Spike Dolomite
4 min readMar 30, 2022

Turns out Kevin McCarthy does have his limits. We’ve found the line, America and Congressboy Madison Cawthorn has crossed it — Republican coke orgies.

Madison has been bragging about getting invited to Washington DC Republican orgies with cocaine for everybody. Kevin McCarthy is not pleased and says he’s going to have a little chat with the boy.

“How’s Ted Cruz feeling right now knowing he’s never been invited to an Orgy in 20 years but the new kid in a wheelchair has been?” — Papi B Dubs

Did House Leader Kevin McCarthy have an issue with newly elected Madison Cawthorn making a speech at the Stop the Steal rally before the attack on the Capitol where he egged the crowd on and called members of Congress, “cowards?” Nope. Kevin didn’t have a problem with that.

How does Kevin McCarthy feel about Madison being sued to keep him from running for re-election because he was part of the insurrection and violated the third section of the 14th amendment which says you can’t run for office if you’ve participated in an insurrection? That’s cool. No problem.

What about Madison tweeting, “Never put your faith in anyone but God. The government can’t work miracles, part the sea, or turn water into wine. They can’t even balance a budget?” Or, “I don’t know who needs to hear this, but our rights do NOT come from the government. They come from God?” No problem.

How about posting a video of himself supporting Kyle Rittenhouse and encouraging people to “be armed and dangerous?” No problem.

Calling for another civil war? No problem.

Pulling out his gun to clean it on camera during an online House Veterans Affairs Committee meeting? No problem.

Selling “Let’s Go Brandon” merchandise on his website? No problem.

Saying that the Republicans are going to put Dr. Fauci in jail after they take the House back? No problem.

Calling into Charlie Kirk’s show during the attack on the Capitol to admit that he used his wheelchair to transport “multiple weapons” ahead of time so he could arm other members of Congress? No problem.

Calling the Ukrainian president a “thug” and the Ukrainian government “incredibly evil,” during a time of war and then learning that the Russians were running that clip on Russian state TV to give the Russian people the impression that members of the US Congress support Russia attacking Ukraine? It’s a little bit of a problem and he shouldn’t have said that but Kevin says he’s going to support his re-election anyway.

Madison Cawthorn is an idiot — a homeschooled, Christian college drop out (one semester of all Ds at a school where 150 students accused him of being a sexual predator) who ended up in a wheelchair after being in a car accident as a teenager. He lied about being accepted into the Naval Academy and he lied about being a disabled veteran. He was elected at the same time that Lauren Boebert and Marjorie Taylor Greene were in 2020, after running a racist campaign at the age of 25 in North Carolina.

Madison Cawthorn visited Hitler’s summer vacation home. It was a goal. He got off on sharing a few laughs with his brother at the very place that Hitler shared a few laughs with his friends.

Madison Cawthorn refers to women as earthen vessels. He has missed a lot of time and votes for his job as a Congressboy because he had to stay home and take care of his wife. She divorced him after 8 months of marriage.

Madison Cawthorn thinks that the British would not have surrendered at Yorktown if George Washington had been wearing a mask.

Madison Cawthorn slandered Nancy Pelosi at a campaign event by telling the crowd, “The theories of alcoholism are very true and it’s very sad.”

Madison Cawthorn says he and Charlie Kirk have a goal of doubling the homeschool population by 2035.

Madison Cawthorn is a huge fan of Trump’s, just like he is of Hitler’s. “Trump has become like a father to me. I get to talk to him just about every single day. He’s incredible — such a genius.”

Fresh face Madison Cawthorn — half wit, liar, sexist, racist, Nazi, insurrectionist, totalitarian. Madison Cawthorn is the new face of the Republican party.

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Spike Dolomite

Daily Crime Report - recounts of Trump and the Republicans’ daily disasters, with puns. Read them all in quarterly reports in The Treason Chronicles on Kindle.